What you will need:
- Box of Kraft Macaroni and Cheese.
- A stick of butter
- A carton of milk
Start off by filling 2/3rds of a pot with tap water. Place it on your stove-top on high. Wait until the water comes to a roaring boil.
Next pop open the cardboard box of macaroni and cheese and poor its contents into the boiling water. WARNING: The box also contains a packet of cheese powder; do not dump this into the boiling water too. You will want to remove that powder packet and set it aside for use later.
Use caution to keep the water from boiling over. You may want to turn the heat down a little bit. The trick is to maintain as strong of a boil as you can without it wanting to boil over. Stir occasionally so as to prevent the macaroni from cementing itself to the bottom of your pot.
After a few minutes dip a spoon in and pick up a few pieces of macaroni, strain the water by placing the side of the spoon against the inner wall of your pot and tilting it so that the water falls through but the macaroni does not. Bring it out of the pan into the cool air where it should cool off pretty quickly. With caution, eat the macaroni to see if it is soft enough. If not, let it boil a little longer and try again until it's just right. You do not want to let it get too soft because that makes for a really gross experience. Do not trust the time guideline on the box, they tell you to cook it way too long.
Once the noodles are to your liking, remove the pot from the stove and strain your macaroni. CAUTION: Do not use your fingers to strain the macaroni as the water will still be too hot at this point and will likely cause severe injury to your hand. Instead, use a strainer. A strainer looks like a bowl with lots of holes in it. Once you're done straining it, place the mac back into the pot.
Now for the scary part: the butter. I've noticed that if you try to hold back on the butter the final product will taste pretty gross. It'll actually taste some what like KFC which is pretty scary. So do not skimp on the butter no matter how frightful it is to chop up half a stick of butter. It has been confirmed that half a stick of butter is not a fatal dose, so fight the instinct not to do it and just do it. Wear some Nikes if you have to. Split your stick of butter in half and chop up one of the halves so it will melt more quickly, dump it on the mac and place the other half in the fridge for the next time you make Kraft Macaroni & Cheese.
Stir the mac until the butter has fully melted and has coated your mac in a glistening layer of grease. Remember that cheese powder packet you almost dumped into the boiling water? It's time to use it now. Tear it open and dump its contents into the pot along with a few splashes of milk. Stir it into the mac and watch it turn from a powdery sand into a orange goopy coating. If you find that it's taking some time to turn into a goopy coat add a splash or two more milk.
That's it! You're done! Scoop some out into a large bowl and serve with a fork or chopsticks.
I hope your enjoy this warm creamy delight as much as I do on these cold winter nights!