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Eulogy for George Carlin*

By yuo in Culture
Tue Jun 24, 2008 at 02:07:36 PM EST
Tags: (all tags)

We join with Catholics and countless others throughout our Diocese and world in giving thanks for the extraordinary life and ministry of Pope John Paul II George Carlin, and in praying for the repose of his noble soul body.

It is fitting that Our Holy Father George Carlin was called to eternal life death during the week day when we celebrate the Easter Feast of St. Thomas More, which puts the reality of death religion into perspective.


Jesus, by His own Passover from death unto life, has revealed to us that death is not the end of life, not the end of human existence, but rather a transition between two stages of life: life here on earth, where we first learn of our eternal destiny, and through our love and service prepare to meet our Maker; and life in heaven, where the sufferings and troubles of this life are banished forever, and where we come to experience that eternal joy, love and peace that Jesus has promised to those who hope and believe in Him.

Jesus said: "I am the resurrection and the life, and those who hope and believe in me will never die."

Jesus was not merely content with proclaiming this mystery of death unto life but testified to its validity by the example of His own life. Jesus is the one who brought eternal life into the world by dying on the cross of Calvary, by being Himself buried in the earth for three days and, then, by rising gloriously on Easter Sunday morn, heralding the triumph of life over death.

Our faith as Christians Christian faith is founded on a paradox, the paradox of death leading to life...the paradox of suffering leading to glory...the paradox of defeat and failure leading to victory.

Pope John Paul II witnessed George Carlin testified to this central message of our Christian faith throughout his 59 years as a priest and bishop, the last 26 years as the Supreme Shepherd in our Church comedian.

In the past few years, as his body was plagued by debilitating Parkinson's disease heart problems and showed so visibly the ravages of age insight, he offered a most powerful witness to the role in the Christian life of pain, suffering, the cross and ultimately death.

Pope John Paul II George Carlin embraced the harsh realities of suffering head-on, and showed that they are an integral and unavoidable part of our pilgrimage here on earth, not to be feared but to be accepted willingly and even joyfully as the inevitable conditions for entrance into eternal life dumb.

Pope John Paul II George Carlin unquestionably was one of the most extraordinary popes critics in the 2,000-year history of the papacy. I would venture to say that, over the past quarter of a century, there was no public figure in the universe who was more well known, loved and revered than Pope John Paul II George Carlin.






*adapted from another eulogy in order to save time.

Let us pray.

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Eulogy for George Carlin* | 12 comments (12 topical, editorial, 0 hidden)
You might want to include a link to (none / 1) (#1)
by wiredog on Mon Jun 23, 2008 at 09:25:02 AM EST

Shit piss fuck cunt cocksucker motherfucker tits

The idea of a global village is wrong, it's more like a gazillion pub bars.
Phage

This is exactly why Al Gore invented... (3.00 / 2) (#2)
by yuo on Mon Jun 23, 2008 at 09:43:22 AM EST

topical comments.

I wish I had thought of pants pants pants pants pants pants pants pants.
[ Parent ]

EXACTLY! (none / 0) (#4)
by Peahippo on Mon Jun 23, 2008 at 01:30:47 PM EST

No proper eulogy for Carlin can avoid the words "shit piss fuck cunt cocksucker motherfucker tits".


[ Parent ]
what a bummer (1.50 / 6) (#3)
by circletimessquare on Mon Jun 23, 2008 at 10:29:41 AM EST

I'm a modern man,
A man for the millennium,
Digital and smoke free.

A diversified multicultural postmodern deconstructionist,
Politically anatomically and ecologically incorrect.

I've been uplinked and downloaded.
I've been inputted and outsourced.
I know the upside of downsizing.
I know the downside of upgrading.

I'm a high tech lowlife.
A cutting edge state-of-the-art bicoastal multitasker,
And I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond.

I'm new wave but I'm old school,
And my inner child is outward bound.

I'm a hot wired heat seeking warm hearted cool customer,
Voice activated and biodegradable.

I interface from a database,
And my database is in cyberspace,
So I'm interactive,
I'm hyperactive,
And from time-to-time,
I'm radioactive.

Behind the eight ball,
Ahead of the curve,
Riding the wave,
Dodging a bullet,
Pushing the envelope.

I'm on point,
On task,
On message,
And off drugs.
I got no need for coke and speed,
I got no urge to binge and purge.

I'm in the moment,
On the edge,
Over the top,
But under the radar.

A high concept,
Low profile,
Medium range ballistic missionary.
A street-wise smart bomb.
A top gun bottom feeder.

I wear power ties,
I tell power lies,
I take power naps,
I run victory laps.

I'm a totally ongoing bigfoot slam dunk rainmaker with a proactive outreach.
A raging workaholic.
A working ragaholic.
Out of rehab,
And in denial.

I got a personal trainer,
A personal shopper,
A personal assistant,
And a personal agenda.

You can't shut me up,
You can't dumb me down.
'Cause I'm tireless,
And I'm wireless.
I'm an alpha male on beta blockers.

I'm a non-believer and an over-achiever.
Laid back but fashion forward.

Up front,
Down home,
Low rent,
High maintenance.

Super size,
Long lasting,
High definition,
Fast acting,
Oven ready,
And built to last.

I'm a hands on,
Foot loose,
Knee jerk,
Head case.

Prematurely post traumatic,
And I have a love child who sends me hate mail.

But I'm feeling,
I'm caring,
I'm healing,
I'm sharing.
A supportive bonding nurturing primary care giver.

My output is down,
But my income is up.
I take a short position on the long bond,
And my revenue stream has its own cash flow.

I read junk mail,
I eat junk food,
I buy junk bonds,
I watch trash sports.

I'm gender specific,
Capital intensive,
User friendly,
And lactose intolerant.

I like rough sex.
I like rough sex.
I like tough love.
I use the f word in my email,
And the software on my hard drive is hard core, no soft porn.

I bought a microwave at a mini mall.
I bought a mini van in a mega store.
I eat fast food in the slow lane.

I'm toll free,
Bite sized,
Ready to wear,
And I come in all sizes.

A fully equipped,
Factory authorized,
Hospital tested,
Clinically proven,
Scientifically formulated medical miracle.

I've been pre-washed,
Pre-cooked,
Pre-heated,
Pre-screened,
Pre-approved,
Pre-packaged,
Post-dated,
Freeze-dried,
Double-wrapped,
Vacuum-packed,
And I have an unlimited broadband capacity.

I'm a rude dude,
But I'm the real deal.
Lean and mean.
Cocked, locked and ready to rock.
Rough tough and hard to bluff.

I take it slow.
I go with the flow.
I ride with the tide.
I got glide in my stride.

Drivin' and movin',
Sailin' and spinnin',
Jivin' and groovin',
Wailin' and winnin'.

I don't snooze,
So I don't lose.
I keep the pedal to the metal,
And the rubber on the road.

I party hearty,
And lunch time is crunch time.

I'm hanging in,
There ain't no doubt.
And I'm hanging tough,
Over and out.

TAGS
George Carlin, Life Is Worth Losing, Beacon Theater, HBO


The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

CTS (none / 0) (#5)
by anaesthetica on Mon Jun 23, 2008 at 03:10:37 PM EST

Why do we get the sloppy-seconds of your cross-posts from Slashdot?

—I'm the little engine that didn't.
k5: our trolls go to eleven
[A]S FAR AS A PERSON'S ACTIONS ARE CONCERNED, IT IS NOT TRUE THAT NOTHING BUT GOOD COMES FROM GOOD AND NOTHING BUT EVIL COMES FROM EVIL, BUT RATHER QUITE FREQUENTLY THE OPPOSITE IS THE CASE. ANYONE WHO DOES NOT REALIZE THIS IS IN FACT A MERE CHILD IN POLITICAL MATTERS. max weber, politics as a vocation


[ Parent ]
wait, you think k5 (1.25 / 4) (#7)
by circletimessquare on Mon Jun 23, 2008 at 03:36:05 PM EST

is worthy of original content?

slashdot is where i post

k5 is where i shit


The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

[ Parent ]

wrong. (2.66 / 9) (#8)
by lostincali on Mon Jun 23, 2008 at 05:47:46 PM EST

your slashdot material is still shit.

"The least busy day [at McDonalds] is Monday, and then sales increase throughout the week, I guess as enthusiasm for life dwindles."
[ Parent ]

what'bout teh frigging movie? it's what you fart? (none / 1) (#10)
by mirko on Wed Jun 25, 2008 at 04:43:33 AM EST

nullo.
--
Finally I managed to make the decision that I would work on it. - MDC
we had to huddle together - trane
[ Parent ]
im a workin on it (none / 0) (#11)
by circletimessquare on Thu Jun 26, 2008 at 12:08:13 AM EST



The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

[ Parent ]
the christmas before (3.00 / 2) (#9)
by nononoitaintmebabe on Mon Jun 23, 2008 at 08:11:13 PM EST

my father died, he sat us all down in the living room and read that poem to all of us.  that was his way of saying "this is great."  he then went on to say something about that he didn't appreciate all of george carlin (my father was a very conservative liberal, if that makes any sense but he appreciated humor when he saw it.) i'm not sure how exactly he ever picked up the porkchops book that this was in, but since that christmas, i've made it a tradition to read this poem to myself.  

anyway, i was kinda saddened today.  to hear that george c had died.  i can remember just laughing my head off at his albums way back in the day.  i didn't even know my father knew who he was.  

[ Parent ]

Not to be outshined, eh? $ (none / 1) (#12)
by icastel on Mon Jun 30, 2008 at 03:22:43 PM EST




-- I like my land flat --
[ Parent ]
Erratum (3.00 / 5) (#6)
by anaesthetica on Mon Jun 23, 2008 at 03:12:01 PM EST

Let us pray.
Let us pray to Joe Pesci.

—I'm the little engine that didn't.
k5: our trolls go to eleven
[A]S FAR AS A PERSON'S ACTIONS ARE CONCERNED, IT IS NOT TRUE THAT NOTHING BUT GOOD COMES FROM GOOD AND NOTHING BUT EVIL COMES FROM EVIL, BUT RATHER QUITE FREQUENTLY THE OPPOSITE IS THE CASE. ANYONE WHO DOES NOT REALIZE THIS IS IN FACT A MERE CHILD IN POLITICAL MATTERS. max weber, politics as a vocation


Eulogy for George Carlin* | 12 comments (12 topical, 0 editorial, 0 hidden)
Display: Sort:

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