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The Meat Hooker: Steak

By mybostinks in Culture
Mon Sep 29, 2008 at 10:32:16 AM EST
Tags: food, steak, k5 is dying, k5 is dead (all tags)
Food

Humans are omnivorous. Probably the reason we are is that we started out as scavengers before we were hunter/gatherers. Eating ancient and primeval 'road kill' must have been nasty enough that some bright ancestor found a pointed stick and jabbed something to death and we tasted fresh meat. That must have gotten old too and so someone else came along and figured out how to prepare and cook meat.

The technique of preparing the perfect steak is quite simple and uncomplicated. It's an art that has almost been forgotten.


I have gone to the finest restaurant I could afford, spent close to $100 for a steak dinner and still haven't eaten a steak as good as what follows. The best thing about it is ANYONE can do it, it's a hell of a lot cheaper and it will be the best steak you ever had. Mastering this (even if you are a vegan) will score points and your guests will go home quite satisfied.

Getting the right cut
This is the most important part of the whole process. Unless the supermarket you shop at has a great meat department with full time butchers then find a butchery that the only thing they sell is meat. Make sure the store is neat, clean and smells good. If your nose doesn't like it neither will your guts.

First, make sure you purchase Angus steak. My favorite cut is rib eye and if you don't know anything about cuts of meat try this one first. Rib eye is a good first time choice for a number of reasons: It's tender and very flavorful.

It is important that you get cuts that have lots of "marbling" and white flecks throughout the cut. This marbling is what gives it great flavor. Unfortunately, finding steak with this is not as easy as it used to be so you might need to shop around. Make sure the butcher cuts the rib eye no less than 1.5 inches thick. Two inch thick rib eye steaks are great.

Note: If you can purchase aged rib eye then you have a magnificent piece of meat. This will be more expensive but well worth the money.

Before you cook it
First a word about cleanliness.
As a general rule when cooking with meat of any kind, use bleach to clean your granite counter tops and just about anything that comes in contact with meat at anytime before you start. It doesn't matter if it is steak or poultry or whatever. Just do it: Your ass and guts will thank you.

Before cooking your steak take it out of the refrigerator and let it warm up to room temperature. You DO NOT want to go directly from the refrigerator and into the pan. Many cooks do this but DON'T be tempted to do it. Warming the raw rib eye should take approx 20-30 minutes at the most. Make sure you keep it covered. If you do not do let the steaks warm up to room temperature, then you will have a ruined steak regardless.

After it has come up to room temperature you will need two things; your favorite cooking oil and pepper that you can hand grind. The cooking oil you want to use is grape seed oil. Something like olive oil will burn and impart an unpleasant flavor to the steak. Don't use cheap shit.

Coat the steak on both sides with the oil and grind pepper to taste on both sides as well. Put the steak on a platter and get out your favorite stove top grill or cast iron pan...the bigger the better. Do not put any oil in the pan, put it on a burner and get it hot enough to start smoking but no hotter. This is important to do.

Once your pan starts smoking place your steak into the pan on one side. It should sizzle the second it touches the pan. If you don't hear the sizzle you have screwed up somehow because the pan is not hot enough. What you are wanting to do here is to sear the steak on both sides about 1/8th to 1/4 inch deep on a 1 1/2 inch or thicker steak. In other words, not very deep at all. You want the outside of the steak to be a golden brown. I have done this enough times that I know when to turn the steak by the way it sounds while cooking in the pan. This will take about 10 to 15 minutes depending on your altitude.

Next, (and this is important) take the cooked steaks out of the pan, don't turn off the burner and place it on a clean platter and let it "rest". During its resting period it will "bleed" its juices. Let it rest for 5 minutes or less. Then take the those juices that have left the steak and pour them into the pan and mix it with a small amount of balsamic vinegar. Cook this for a minute or so and then pour this over the steak.

Serve the steak!

Sure, you can serve the rib eye with a mung bean or alfalfa sprout salad but for me I serve it with the best burgundy I can find, a baked potato with sour cream and minced green onions. A two inch thick steak with a baked white rose potato is a hearty meal.

Congratulations, you have just cooked the best steak you can eat.

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The Meat Hooker: Steak | 72 comments (50 topical, 22 editorial, 0 hidden)
Letting the steak "sit" and bleed, (none / 1) (#6)
by dakini on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 01:44:21 AM EST

continues cooking the steak. So this is not a "rare" steak? Just wondering if this would be rare, medium or well done? thanks!!

" May your vision be clear, your heart strong, and may you always follow your dreams."
This will make the steak medium rare /nt (none / 1) (#8)
by mybostinks on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 01:47:14 AM EST



[ Parent ]
Thanks! was hoping this was so! (none / 0) (#18)
by dakini on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 06:31:43 AM EST



" May your vision be clear, your heart strong, and may you always follow your dreams."
[ Parent ]
Too much cooking and back half? (3.00 / 2) (#15)
by sholden on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 03:24:51 AM EST

You must divide your cow in halfs at a different place than I do. The ribs (and hence rib eye cuts) are in the front half - at the back of the front half, yes, but certainly not from the back half.

And 15-20 minutes? You're way into medium-rare territory there, possibly medium... Real men cook steak to blue and not a second longer.

--
The world's dullest web page


Yes. Blue. Good. Rare is overcooked is BAD. (none / 0) (#17)
by Corwin06 on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 06:03:53 AM EST

Don't ruin good meat. THAT is murder.
"and you sir, in an argument in a thread with a troll in a story no one is reading in a backwater website, you're a fucking genius
--circletimessquare
[ Parent ]
I like my steak (none / 1) (#22)
by mybostinks on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 10:52:39 AM EST

reddish-pink. The time is total time and I adjusted it. Most cuts of steak come from the back if I remember. However, you are correct in that rib eye does not.

[ Parent ]
Bah. (none / 1) (#29)
by regeya on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 02:45:16 PM EST

If you cannot cook steak well done, and have it be nice and juicy, just forget telling anyone you know what you're doing.

Most people I've met who go on about "cremating" meat complain because well done is dry. Sorry, but cooking meat ain't rocket science. I guess if you can't have it juicy and well done, just stay away from the kitchen, m'kay?

[ yokelpunk | kuro5hin diary ]
[ Parent ]

It's got nothing to do with dry (none / 1) (#31)
by sholden on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 03:33:15 PM EST

It needs to moo when you stick the fork in.

For two reasons:

  1. The texture is better.

  2. It helps keep your stomach used to dealing with lots of bacteria so that when the zombies come you have a vague chance of making it.

--
The world's dullest web page


[ Parent ]
Zombies prefer their steaks not "raw" (none / 0) (#32)
by alba on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 03:57:23 PM EST

but "alive".

[ Parent ]
Yes, but the plan is to not be a zombie (none / 0) (#35)
by sholden on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 05:38:02 PM EST

Chances are the food and water supply is going to be ever so slightly less "hygienic" when they start their swarming though...

--
The world's dullest web page


[ Parent ]
A couple of comments (3.00 / 3) (#16)
by Corwin06 on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 06:02:02 AM EST

The cooking oil you want to use is grape seed oil. Something like olive oil will burn and impart an unpleasant flavor to the steak. Don't use cheap shit.
Grape seed oil? Might be a good dea, but you can certainly use olive oil too! But it changes the cooking method : put the olive oil in the pan before you begin to heat it up, then put the steak in the oil before it's too hot and does burn. It WILL taste great, but you have to control the temperature : as soon as it smokes, it's burnt.
Next, (and this is important) take the cooked steaks out of the pan, don't turn off the burner and place it on a clean platter and let it "rest". During its resting period it will "bleed" its juices. Let it rest for about 5 minutes or less. Then take those juices that have left the steak and pour them into the pan and mix it with a small amount of balsamic vinegar. Cook this for a minute or so and then pour this over the steak.
Balsamic vinegar fails it. It will ruin the taste of the steak. Use water in case of diet or cream with some weak flavouring like mushrooms or pink peppers, so the strongest taste on your plate is meat, not sugared vinegar.

Also, Angus is nowhere near the only good beef strain! In Blegium we have the Blue-White-Belgian (Bleu-blanc-belge), it's a meat with almost no fat (so not marbled), tastes a little weak, but then, no fat. Good for sportive types who eat lots of red meat for building muscle mass.
Then the best steak in the world is Kobe beef, it's fuckin' MASSAGED before slaughter. Tender as love and the finest taste ever.
There also is Charolais, it's the French good beef. Incredibly marbled, rich, tasty, LOTS of juices.
Then Irish beef is good, too. Second choice after the Angus.

"and you sir, in an argument in a thread with a troll in a story no one is reading in a backwater website, you're a fucking genius
--circletimessquare
Traditional Brazilian steaks (3.00 / 2) (#24)
by cbraga on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 12:54:18 PM EST

In Brazil, specially the southern end, we have a long tradition of preparing steaks we're quite proud of, and visiting foreigners are usually impressed. Traditional brazilian barbecue ("churrasco") is very simple.

The meat is usually rump or rump cover which in the USA is not considered a premium meat, but here are the most expensive cuts and for barbecue are usually cut around half inch thick. It is prepared by covering both sides in rough (unrefined) salt, letting it sit for a couple minutes then shaking the salt and placing straight on the grill.

To be authentic the grill must use coal fire. Good, black coal gives the meat a special taste that definitely won't be there if a gas or electric grill is used. The coals must be lighted at least half an hour before placing the meat, by then the flames should subside and the coals should all be glowing red.

The cook then waits the appropriate time for the first side to go brown and turns it over, when both sides are brown it's served. The middle should be still red, like a good rare to medium rare steak.

I'm certainly partial but I definitely have not ever had any steak better than those prepared using these traditional steps.

ESC[78;89;13p ESC[110;121;13p

this is excellent (none / 1) (#25)
by mybostinks on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 12:57:34 PM EST

I will have to try this.

[ Parent ]
rumps are prized in brazil (3.00 / 8) (#28)
by lostincali on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 02:06:24 PM EST

this should be shocking to nobody.

"The least busy day [at McDonalds] is Monday, and then sales increase throughout the week, I guess as enthusiasm for life dwindles."
[ Parent ]

certainly you could come up with a better insult (none / 1) (#43)
by cbraga on Mon Sep 29, 2008 at 01:18:05 AM EST

you seem to imply we have some sort of restriction in selecting our meats, yet little of our cattle production is exported, you know.

ESC[78;89;13p ESC[110;121;13p
[ Parent ]
moron: he's saying the female brazilian derriere (3.00 / 2) (#45)
by circletimessquare on Mon Sep 29, 2008 at 04:39:22 AM EST

is remarkable, and celebrated

and it most certainly is. what the hell got into the gene pool down there?

it's a compliment


The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

[ Parent ]

how is this insulting? (none / 0) (#53)
by lostincali on Mon Sep 29, 2008 at 07:04:44 PM EST

i've just noted in my experience that brazilian culture seems to have a real thing for women with big butts.

"The least busy day [at McDonalds] is Monday, and then sales increase throughout the week, I guess as enthusiasm for life dwindles."
[ Parent ]

angus? (3.00 / 4) (#26)
by khallow on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 01:32:21 PM EST

Why does it have to be angus beef? Is there a real difference or is this a case of strong preferences means zero clue?

Stating the obvious since 1969.

no it doesn't have to be angus (none / 1) (#27)
by mybostinks on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 01:51:51 PM EST

it is just my preference. I do think it has a better flavor but another good tasting breed is fine.

[ Parent ]
interesting link, confirms many suspicions about (none / 1) (#41)
by rhiannon on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 11:53:40 PM EST

business majors

-----------------------------------------
I continued to rebuff the advances... so many advances... of so many attractive women. -MC
[ Parent ]
confirms many suspicions about (none / 0) (#57)
by daveybaby on Tue Sep 30, 2008 at 05:55:38 AM EST

pretty much everything on the internet

[ Parent ]
FAIL (1.83 / 6) (#30)
by undermyne on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 03:06:00 PM EST

As soon as you said "Angus" and "Rib-eye" I knew that you have no fucking idea what you are talking about. And cooking a steak in a pan? Nigger please (DIAF).

"You're an asshole. You are the greatest troll on this site." Some nullo
-1AWTP (1.50 / 2) (#33)
by Enlarged to Show Texture on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 04:01:00 PM EST

Wrong cut, wrong method...


"Those people who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do." -- Isaac Asimov
[ Parent ]
Angus is a breed of cattle (none / 0) (#55)
by mybostinks on Mon Sep 29, 2008 at 07:32:31 PM EST

rib eye is a cut of steak which in fact, is the most tender part of a steer. Most butchers will tell you that.

[ Parent ]
You are a fucking idiot (none / 1) (#59)
by undermyne on Tue Sep 30, 2008 at 10:59:08 AM EST

no butcher will tell you rib-eye is the most tender part of a cow.

"You're an asshole. You are the greatest troll on this site." Some nullo [ Parent ]
Rib-eye is tender WTF? (none / 0) (#65)
by Corwin06 on Wed Oct 01, 2008 at 05:37:20 AM EST

It's tasty, not tender. Not the tastiest part of the beef, either - that is the hanger. The most tender is the tenderloin.
"and you sir, in an argument in a thread with a troll in a story no one is reading in a backwater website, you're a fucking genius
--circletimessquare
[ Parent ]
well look whos article posted (2.50 / 4) (#60)
by blackbart on Tue Sep 30, 2008 at 12:42:52 PM EST

and who's didn't!

"I use this dupe for modbombing and impersonating a highly paid government worker"
- army of phred
[ Parent ]

Rib-eye + Pan + AWESOME (none / 1) (#63)
by localman on Wed Oct 01, 2008 at 02:08:24 AM EST

This method is very close to how a real man does it.  I've tried every cut of meat, I've tried every cooking method.  This guy got it right.  If you don't agree, you're wrong.  You have no idea what you're talking about.

My only significant change would be I put a blob of garlic butter on top of the steak when resting it instead of the balsamic/au jus glaze.

[ Parent ]

Garlic butter FTW (none / 0) (#66)
by Corwin06 on Wed Oct 01, 2008 at 05:41:13 AM EST

Only on meat tasty enough that its flavour won't be killed by the garlic, though.

Garlic butter would better go on the potatoes IMO... Or garlic cream.

Vinegar au jus glaze, only for pork. Never on beef.

"and you sir, in an argument in a thread with a troll in a story no one is reading in a backwater website, you're a fucking genius
--circletimessquare
[ Parent ]
At last, an article about meat (3.00 / 3) (#34)
by Harry B Otch on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 04:27:06 PM EST

that I can really sink my teeth into.  It's succulent, full of juicy tidbits, and peppered throughout with plenty of bon mots and horsecock.

Is there a vegetarian version of the recipe available?

-----
You shouldn't never use a double negative

+1, Steak /nt (3.00 / 2) (#36)
by bodza on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 06:36:03 PM EST


--
"Civilization will not attain to its perfection until the last stone from the last church falls on the last priest." - Émile Zola

YES BUT CAN YOU ADD IT TO MAC AND CHEESE (2.50 / 4) (#38)
by j1mmy on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 08:17:46 PM EST

I THINK SO

THIS SOUNDS GOOD TO ME

I'll fry one up to celebrate (none / 0) (#39)
by MichaelCrawford on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 09:20:09 PM EST

.. my hoped-for success at my upcoming cholesterol test.

I'm getting pretty damn tired of my vegan diet. One the other hand, Grandpa Speelmon died young of a heart attack, so I had to take my doc's warning seriously.


--

Live your fucking life. Sue someone on the Internet. Write a fucking music player. Like the great man Michael David Crawford has shown us all: Hard work, a strong will to stalk, and a few fries short of a happy meal goes a long way. -- bride of spidy


I thought you died (none / 0) (#51)
by ghjm on Mon Sep 29, 2008 at 05:00:48 PM EST

Are you sure you aren't dead?

[ Parent ]
So this is Hell, then? (none / 1) (#52)
by MichaelCrawford on Mon Sep 29, 2008 at 05:44:06 PM EST

It sure ain't Heaven!


--

Live your fucking life. Sue someone on the Internet. Write a fucking music player. Like the great man Michael David Crawford has shown us all: Hard work, a strong will to stalk, and a few fries short of a happy meal goes a long way. -- bride of spidy


[ Parent ]

main points (none / 0) (#40)
by rhiannon on Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 10:52:13 PM EST

the main thing to cooking a good steak is using high heat to sear the outside and lock in the juices, after you sear the outside you can reduce the heat a bit if you need it medium or well done and it will still come out tender and juicy. And the part about resting, if you take a steak off the heat, cut it open and it's perfect then you cooked it too long.

My wife likes em raw, it's crazy gross and my dad likes em well done, I've found by starting them on the grill at high heat(temp reads over 400) and then moving the steak around you can satisfy both extremes.

-----------------------------------------
I continued to rebuff the advances... so many advances... of so many attractive women. -MC

A common misconception (3.00 / 5) (#49)
by Altus on Mon Sep 29, 2008 at 03:13:15 PM EST

This is a common misconception and it was one that I took as truth for a long time.  Alton Brown did a good mythbusters style experiement on it.  He cooked 2 identical steaks, one he seared on extremely high head and the other he slow cooked.  In the end the slow cooked steak weighed more than the seared one.  This makes sense since searing breaks up cells and actually lets some moisture out that otherwise wouldn't be.

That said, you should sear your steak.  Searing may not hold in juices but it does cause the Maillard reaction which is what makes things brown when they cook.  It is also what makes things delicious.  Those bits of brown (plus the brown bits in the pan called fond) that provides so much of what makes meat worth cooking.

"In America, first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women..." -H. Simpson
[ Parent ]

yeah I've been curious about that (none / 0) (#50)
by rhiannon on Mon Sep 29, 2008 at 03:48:23 PM EST

Because it doesn't really make sense, is it just the reduced amount of time that it takes to cook the meat that makes it juicy or what?

-----------------------------------------
I continued to rebuff the advances... so many advances... of so many attractive women. -MC
[ Parent ]
pretty much everything i was going to write. (none / 0) (#54)
by lostincali on Mon Sep 29, 2008 at 07:07:42 PM EST


"The least busy day [at McDonalds] is Monday, and then sales increase throughout the week, I guess as enthusiasm for life dwindles."
[ Parent ]

Wikipedia disagrees (none / 0) (#62)
by alba on Tue Sep 30, 2008 at 06:59:51 PM EST

That said, you should sear your steak. Searing may not hold in juices but it does cause the Maillard reaction which is what makes things brown when they cook.

The browning reactions which occur when meat is roasted or seared have often been referred to as Maillard reaction browning. However, lean meat contains very few, if any, reducing sugars. Furthermore, red meat undergoes more extensive browning than does white meat. The browning reactions in lean meat are most likely due to the breakdown of the tetrapyrrole rings of the muscle protein, myoglobin. Thus, the browning of meat is technically not a Maillard browning since it does not involve the reaction with a reducing sugar.

[ Parent ]
Interesting (none / 1) (#67)
by Altus on Wed Oct 01, 2008 at 11:15:00 AM EST


since the wiki entry on browning (partial cooking) links to the wiki entry on the Millard reaction

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Browning_(partial_cooking)

One of them has to be wrong.  I wonder which one it is.  And if its not the Millard reaction that causes browning in meat, what does?

Ill have to see if I can find an answer to this.

"In America, first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women..." -H. Simpson
[ Parent ]

On Food And Cooking (none / 0) (#71)
by alwaysean on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 05:04:36 AM EST

you need to read this:
On Food And Cooking: The Science And Lore Of The Kitchen: Harold McGee

--
lido66
[ Parent ]
"Angus" is a brand, not a grade. (none / 0) (#47)
by Joe D on Mon Sep 29, 2008 at 12:15:26 PM EST

The USDA (assuming you're in the US) has three grades for beef: Prime, Choice, and Select.

What is now called "Select" used to be named "Good", but was renamed so that it could be marketed easier.  The actual criteria used are the same.  People learned that the "Good" grade wasn't really all that good, and so they weren't buying it.  So the beef industry got the USDA to rename it.

Angus is a brand name, and is taken from the high end of the "Choice" grade.  You're paying extra for the marketing behind it.


It's neither, Angus is a breed of cattle (2.88 / 9) (#48)
by mybostinks on Mon Sep 29, 2008 at 02:24:03 PM EST

which is what I was referring to...

Angus cattle.

[ Parent ]

key here, especially for cooked steak (none / 0) (#56)
by Morally Inflexible on Tue Sep 30, 2008 at 12:02:21 AM EST

(that is, medium to well done) is don't mess with it until you are ready to put it in your mouth. Don't cut it to see how pink it is, don't press on it as it cooks to hear it sizzle. both of these things result in a dry steak. You should only touch it when you have to turn it over to cook the other side. otherwise, Don't touch.

If you follow this one simple rule, you can eat even well done steak that isn't dry.

Doing steak right requires just one thing. (none / 0) (#58)
by daveybaby on Tue Sep 30, 2008 at 06:05:08 AM EST

That thing is Science.

part 1
part 2
part 3

I prefer mine slighly different. (none / 1) (#61)
by xC0000005 on Tue Sep 30, 2008 at 04:58:56 PM EST

I use the olive oil as mentioned below and heat it until it shimmers. Then I crush garlic in a medium press and add it to the oil with fresh ground pepper. I salt the steak lightly and then pan fry on both sides, replenishing garlic if necesary. I like my meat done and so will pop it into a clay shell and bake it afterwards in the garlic/salt/pepper oil for a few minutes. Then rest it and serve.

For really thick steaks I slice a pocket into the center and stuff with garlic and rough crushed pepper corns, then cook as above.

Voice of the Hive - Beekeeping and Bees for those who don't

Steak cut (none / 0) (#69)
by Akaru on Tue Oct 28, 2008 at 09:42:31 AM EST

I think whilst getting good meat is essential it isn't a matter of having only one cut of steak.

Different cuts have different textures and flavours and also require different cooking. Without good meat you'll never have good steak. You can't improve bad meat by cooking it. But you can ruin good meat with bad cooking.

Whilst the cut is important, as not all meats are suitable for cooking as a steak what is more important is the quality of the meat. The age of the animal, how it was raised, the amount of time it has been hung and how it was butchered.

I would say that the best steak is the one you least expect. Last night I had a nice tenderloin steak, 5 minutes each side on a medium heat to cook it then a 30 second sear on both sides. The results were a medium rare delightfully tender steak. One of the best steaks I've had and certainly a better use of the tenderloin than I've had before.


i'm not convinced primeval man was a necrovore (2.00 / 3) (#70)
by Ron Paul on Wed Nov 19, 2008 at 01:24:38 AM EST

Road kill would have got people sick same as now. What do bonobo monkies eat?

This [Ron Paul] Diary! has brought Kuro5hin back to life! HUZZAH


Dry-aged steaks (none / 0) (#72)
by Kaifan on Tue Apr 21, 2009 at 01:41:34 PM EST

If you can get your hands on these (or afford them) they absolutely taste better. Also, natural-raised grain fed and grass fed tend to have a better flavor.
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The Meat Hooker: Steak | 72 comments (50 topical, 22 editorial, 0 hidden)
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