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By LilDebbie in Fiction
Sun Aug 28, 2005 at 07:34:29 AM EST
Tags: Freedom (all tags)

They can ignore us no longer. Our message is being beamed out from every satellite, every tower, and through leagues of fiber optic. The Movement is gaining momentum thanks to the courage and dedication of the few. I am proud to say I am among those few.

Like all revolutionary ideas, it came to us while we were drinking. It was Saturday night and we were celebrating another successful protest march. Ten thousand people showed up that afternoon to tell the government that we will not sit idly by while they lead us into yet another disaster. Sure, the "official" count according to the police was only three thousand, but that's just another example of how they'll say anything to belittle the Movement. I mean, who are you going to trust? The pigs?

We were about halfway through a case of Rolling Rock when Timmy, pessimist he is, starts going off on how the march meant shit and we hadn't accomplished anything. We argued with him saying it raises awareness, that by confronting the public with the truth they've been blinded to we could get some real change going. He was having none of it. Tim's always been an argumentative guy and, well, he'd been drinking. To make his point, he staggered over to the television and started flipping through the local news channels. "See," he slurred, "not one god damn mention of the march. Fat lot of good we did today."

He had a point. All we saw were the same molded plastic Barbie dolls reading the same litany of murders, rapes, disasters, etc. off the same teleprompter. Hell, they probably shared studio space. Greg, always trying to put a positive spin on everything, suggested we put our heads together and think of a better approach to educating the public. Granted, we were all drunk at this point, but we had an amazing brainstorming session. Tim was so excited that not only had he won the debate, but we were actually doing something about it as a result, that he ran into the kitchen to grab the whiteboard we use for messages and the occasional dick joke. Soon he had it propped up on the couch, writing down any remotely plausible suggestion.

We had come up with a lot of dumb fucking ideas when finally it hit me like a police baton. Our goal was to educate the public and the most direct way to do that is through television (sadly enough). So how do we get on television? We had left the news on during our brainstorm with the volume muted but you could still see the images roll by of overturned semis, burning houses, and missing white girls. It was so simple. We spent the rest of the night planning for the next march.

That morning we gathered our empties and drove out to the quarry. There we practiced our best spirals, smashing glass against rocks we set out away from us. We were all excited about our new plan to spread awareness, but we were also pretty hungover. After six or seven tries, I eventually got it down to the point where I could nail a rock thirty yards out. Of course, the bottles ran out pretty quickly, but we had honed our skills nonetheless. Afterwards we went to Denny's to hash out the logistics of the operation.

When the day of the march finally came, we could barely sit still as we triple checked our gear. We gathered at Greg's house at nine o'clock because he had a car (no bikes today, we needed to get out of there fast). Yeah, early start, but I wanted to have time to make sure everything was ready. Tim wanted to smoke a bowl to calm his nerves but I had to stop that shit cold; our heads needed to be clear for the mission. There'd be plenty of time to celebrate afterwards. After reviewing the plan for the fifth time, Greg pointed out that we needed to haul ass out of there if we wanted to get to the march on time, so we piled into his car and left.

When we arrived, riot police were already lined up on the sidewalk along the march route. Perfect. Stupid pigs won't know what hit 'em. People were already gathering together as the usual speakers made their ineffectual speeches. Not to worry, today we'd give them a voice. The march organizers started corralling people to the starting point and fortunately they were wearing bright red arm bands to make spotting them easier. Another bonus. Today they were the enemy.

The march started to the tune of "We Shall Overcome". They only made it a block before windows started shattering. All this technology and look what a simple rock can do. The police, predictably, immediately formed a line in the path of the marchers. To their credit, they came right up to the police line. Sadly, they pussied out and just shouted at the cops. They were going to need further persuasion. At this point, we wrapped bandanas over our faces. With our sunglasses, not only did they conceal our identity, but the inside layer of activated charcoal would come in very handy after the next thirty seconds or so.

Out of nowhere, three Rolling Rock bottles sailed out of the crowd in perfect spirals. Their mysterious numerology containing a mixture of gasoline and sulphuric acid. Taped carefully around the outside was a paper towel that had been soaked in a solution of potassium chlorate and ordinary baking sugar. It's amazing the things one can learn on the Internet. The bottles, having never been designed for extended flight, began wobbling middair until they shattered on some poor little piggy's riot shield. Those fuckers now found themselves the main course at our impromptu barbecue.

Right on cue, the police charged the crowd. We knew we had to get the fuck out of there as soon as possible, so we dropped our homemade CN canisters (this one isn't so complicated - it's called a can of spray mace with the trigger taped down when "activated") and got the hell out of there. Not long after that the cops added their own chemical clouds to further obscure us and send everyone else running like hell. We each ran a different direction and ditched the bandanas as soon as we could breathe. Later, we met up and drove home to celebrate.

We were halfway through another case of Rolling Rock before Greg finally got the nerve to turn on the television. Tim was already passed out and I was flying high; alcohol, THC, and adrenalin making a heady cocktail. We had done it. Over two hundred arrests and thirty-three injured. Nationwide, people and pundits were talking about the march. Our march. Greg and I settled on Fox News for shits and giggles and watched as the talking heads tried to make sense of the chaos we had sown. Raising my beer to our triumph, I sat back confident that the voice for peace was silent no more.


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Voice | 76 comments (28 topical, 48 editorial, 0 hidden)
That was by far the best piece of fiction (none / 1) (#3)
by AlwaysAnonymized on Thu Aug 25, 2005 at 09:18:08 PM EST

I have ever read. Jesus Christ. I have no idea what to even say to that except more please. Thank you.

what was so great about it? n/t (none / 1) (#16)
by tweetsybefore on Fri Aug 26, 2005 at 11:22:50 AM EST

I'm racist and I hate niggers.
[ Parent ]
The irony was cool... (none / 0) (#64)
by mikelist on Sun Aug 28, 2005 at 08:29:06 AM EST

...and didn't really catalyze until the last line. A good, if fairly obvious, piece of fiction. Worse has done better here, although I don't really keep track.

[ Parent ]
fucking beautiful, marry me lildebbie (2.37 / 8) (#8)
by circletimessquare on Thu Aug 25, 2005 at 10:18:01 PM EST

are you listening you retarded useless western children?

read it again: toddlers with temper tantrums, know thyselves

the truth is there is nothing wrong with agitation

but the truth is also that there is always agitation, it's really not interesting or compelling

the difference between agitaiton and revolution is an organizing idea, a positive alternative

nothing, no genuine social change, was ever founded on simply brainless pointless negativity and rejection of the status quo

agitation needs an organizing idea, a REAL one, a non-idealistic one, that finds resonance in the general public, before it becomes a real revolution

otherwise, it ain't shit but angry teenagers acting like angry teenagers always have: loud, self-involved, indolent

rage againt the machine is really cool to listen to

but you can't merely resist, you need to build something to

that's the real revolution, the one that coallesces genuine social change

everything else is bullshit

The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

+3 Messianic <nt> (3.00 / 3) (#11)
by The Diary Section on Thu Aug 25, 2005 at 10:50:00 PM EST

We have not journeyed across the centuries, across the oceans, across the mountains, across the prairies, because we are made of sugar candy.
[ Parent ]

Without wishing to descend into hero-worship (none / 1) (#20)
by stuaart on Fri Aug 26, 2005 at 01:06:32 PM EST


Linkwhore: [Hidden stories.] Baldrtainment: Corporate concubines and Baldrson: An Introspective

[ Parent ]
You guys are one gay dynamics duo. (3.00 / 9) (#41)
by Pooping in Urinals on Fri Aug 26, 2005 at 08:17:02 PM EST

"...[T]he first midget amputee getting bukkaked by 20 japanese buddhist monks and I bet your gonna say 'well thats what the miscellaneous column is for.'" -- army of phred
[ Parent ]

-1 It sucks. n/t (1.40 / 5) (#15)
by tweetsybefore on Fri Aug 26, 2005 at 11:21:59 AM EST

I'm racist and I hate niggers.
Good (none / 1) (#21)
by stuaart on Fri Aug 26, 2005 at 01:07:15 PM EST

But the first few paras could do with tightening up.

Linkwhore: [Hidden stories.] Baldrtainment: Corporate concubines and Baldrson: An Introspective

Maybe later (none / 1) (#24)
by LilDebbie on Fri Aug 26, 2005 at 01:44:08 PM EST

It's too soon from the initial writing for me to do any major revisions. I'm just fixing nits right now. Truth be told, I haven't even read over the whole thing. I have this weird thing with writing where I have to distance myself from the work immediately after writing it.

My name is LilDebbie and I have a garden.
- hugin -

[ Parent ]
First non-localroger fiction I've voted fp. (3.00 / 2) (#36)
by NoMoreNicksLeft on Fri Aug 26, 2005 at 07:48:09 PM EST

Not bad, but I expect improvement on the next story. And quit trolling me.

Do not look directly into laser with remaining good eye.
I have no idea what you're talking about. $ (none / 1) (#38)
by LilDebbie on Fri Aug 26, 2005 at 07:56:03 PM EST

My name is LilDebbie and I have a garden.
- hugin -

[ Parent ]
I"m voting you up (none / 1) (#45)
by Egil Skallagrimson on Sat Aug 27, 2005 at 12:17:33 AM EST

even though you never vote up my masterpieces. And this is despite the fact that I think you and your friends are relatively wankers.


Enterobacteria phage T2 is a virulent bacteriophage of the T4-like viruses genus, in the family Myoviridae. It infects E. coli and is the best known of the T-even phages. Its virion contains linear double-stranded DNA, terminally redundant and circularly permuted.

It wasn't personal (none / 1) (#48)
by LilDebbie on Sat Aug 27, 2005 at 10:00:44 AM EST

I just think literary criticism is a plague on god and man.

My name is LilDebbie and I have a garden.
- hugin -

[ Parent ]
It's kind of like the WTO in Seattle (3.00 / 8) (#57)
by Big Sexxy Joe on Sat Aug 27, 2005 at 07:45:50 PM EST

A couple people broke a window at a Starbuck's and the media jumped all over "the violence of the left."

What you are spewing is not satire, but propaganda.    However, the U.S. is turning against the war and you can't reverse that trend.

I'm like Jesus, only better.
Democracy Now! - your daily, uncensored, corporate-free grassroots news hour

Am I the only one who (3.00 / 8) (#58)
by AlwaysAnonymized on Sat Aug 27, 2005 at 07:59:42 PM EST

looks at the two stories in the queue (this one and that one about the k5 party) and begins to think that one of them is explaining what is going to happen at the other?

Fair enough. Old, though. (3.00 / 7) (#60)
by Russell Dovey on Sun Aug 28, 2005 at 04:37:11 AM EST

I guess this shows that the right have their tired, outdated stories about the evils of the Left just as we lefties have ours about the Right.

But you left out how these drug-fuelled yahoos are often in the pay of the cops, or are undercover cops themselves.

"Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light." - Spike Milligan

Honestly, I was sorta disappointed. (none / 1) (#62)
by spooked on Sun Aug 28, 2005 at 07:43:55 AM EST

Little build up and little release. Personally, I find that if you soak the coctail with styrofoam bits that it becomes somewhat gelatious, ergo napalm. Also, the sunglass should have been ski or swimming gogles, as sunglasses do shit verus pepper spray and tear gas.

But what the hell you've just embodied my teenage dream to be a riot boy; it's a shame us Canadians really don't have too much to get worked up about, and Quebec was pretty far a way when the Summit happened. Mind you, we did rise to the occation and I've cast my own stones at the local embassy.

On tactics (none / 1) (#66)
by LilDebbie on Sun Aug 28, 2005 at 11:31:37 AM EST

Ski and swimming goggles look hella suspect, while the right kind of wraparound shades, in conjunction with vaseline around the eyes, will provide meaningful protect.

As to the styrofoam, I wouldn't add it for fear of it interfering with the auto-ignition system. But yeah, I know exactly what you're talking about. Made some in HS. Sticky as shit but easy to put out if you roll in the dirt.

My name is LilDebbie and I have a garden.
- hugin -

[ Parent ]

tru dat. (none / 0) (#68)
by spooked on Sun Aug 28, 2005 at 02:42:06 PM EST

Yeah, your ignition sysytem is different the bottle full of fuel/gel capped with a fuel soaked and flaming tampon. True, it doesn't light everytime but it's reasonable effective and simple.

[ Parent ]
The nice part about chemical ignition (none / 0) (#69)
by LilDebbie on Sun Aug 28, 2005 at 03:35:41 PM EST

is that it's less likely to be identified as a bomb until it hits its target. The downside is their kind of unstable and are more likely to blow up on you than the classic cocktail.

My name is LilDebbie and I have a garden.
- hugin -

[ Parent ]
this kinda stuff (3.00 / 3) (#63)
by mikelist on Sun Aug 28, 2005 at 08:22:04 AM EST

was alleged to have happened a few times back in the '60s and early '70s. The term used was 'agent provocateur', but was often just sincere but stoned activists being pep-talked into taking radical actions. I don't think police involvement was ever proved in any of the cases I've heard of, but these things tended to be summarily dismissed.

It DOES kind of illustrate how things can get out of hand, even when the adversarial relationship is fairly lightweight. Speaking up only works when someone listens, and frustration at not being heard is the driving force behind terrorism and civil war.

Nice (none / 1) (#65)
by l3nz on Sun Aug 28, 2005 at 09:51:35 AM EST

and not so fictious, after all! :-)

Popk ToDo lists - yet another web-based ToDo list manager. 100% AJAX free :-)

voice (2.00 / 2) (#72)
by aresdracul on Mon Aug 29, 2005 at 01:32:08 PM EST

too bad this is fiction. if the "rebels" in the real world were less concerned with drugs and parties, they would be actually committed to real change. you can't fight the state when you are off your face. true revolutionaries don't use drugs. yes alcohol is a drug.
I suppose you are a real revoloutionairy. n/t (none / 1) (#73)
by tweetsybefore on Thu Sep 01, 2005 at 01:51:01 AM EST

I'm racist and I hate niggers.
[ Parent ]
by aresdracul on Fri Sep 30, 2005 at 01:29:23 PM EST

[ Parent ]
HOMEY EX. (none / 0) (#75)
by aresdracul on Fri Sep 30, 2005 at 01:33:30 PM EST

you home recipes are gonna get a bunch a dumb kids hurt, go back to chem 101 and quit endagering the ridiculously stupid. but your story was good otherwise
Voice | 76 comments (28 topical, 48 editorial, 0 hidden)
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