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[P]
Fuck Christmas, we aren't having it this year.

By undermyne in Meta
Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 01:01:11 PM EST
Tags: (all tags)

For the last 10 years or so we (my wife and I) have been advocating for a change in how our respective families celebrate the Christmas holiday. This year, with the help of circumstance, we decided to cease observation of the Christmas holiday (and all other Catholic holidays) and make our annual family-oriented holiday Thanksgiving. What has been most surprising about this is the consistent response to our decision, a chorus of "scrooge","what about your kids?!", and "How exactly is CHRISTmas not a Christian holiday". Not one single person has said "neat", even the unwashed pagans get all bent out of shape about it. Apparently not celebrating Christmas makes you a bad parent, the anti-Christ, and a generally despised pariah (not necessarily in that order).


Our reasons for this decision:

Christmas is a Catholic holiday, started in the 4th century. The date was picked to coincide with several existing and historical seasonal celebrations so as to make the holiday an easier "sell" for the rapidly expanding Catholic church. It is not, in fact, Jesus' birthday.

We aren't catholic.

All the popular Christmas rituals are pagan in origin. The Christmas tree, gift giving (no it has nothing to do with the Wise Men), feasting, and mistletoe are all pagan traditions that for the most part predate the birth of Christ.

We aren't pagans. (but I did put lights on the house)

Christmas isn't about Jesus, its about unadulterated consumerism and entitlement (try not giving gifts to your kids, see how they react). People trampling Walmart employees to get that special deal, endless sales, wish-lists, credit-card debt, long lines, last-minute presents, etc.

We have more than enough stuff.

Christmas is one of a long list of Christian dogmatic ideas that have been promulgated over the many centuries until the truth has become so blurred that people don't even think to challenge it.

We challenge it.

And finally, not celebrating Christmas is bound to send my wife's hyper-religious family into fits. Most of them consider me to be your typical, outspoken, obnoxiously American asshole (which I am) and I so desperately hate to let them down. We weren't even invited to Christmas with her immediate family the last two years (in spite of just having moved up here specifically to be around them). We got invited this year only because one of my wife's siblings (that really, really doesn't like me) isn't going to be there so it was okay if we came. Warm special Christmas feelings wash all over me as I type this.

We are in no way being critical of those who chose to celebrate Christmas, which is basically everyone we know. We have many fond memories of Christmas' past and hope that those who continue to celebrate do have a Merry Christmas.

On December 25th we will not be opening presents (all Christmas gifts will be given to charity). Apologies to my neice and nephews who will be short a present or two this year.

We may have a nice dinner but we won't be observing any traditional Christmas customs. We hope to spend the day like any other day; being thankful for our many undeserved blessings, being thankful for every day with our children and each other, being thankful for all of our family and friends and the richness they bring into our lives, and trying our best to honor all of those things by living each day to the fullest.

In closing, Bah humbug.

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Poll
On December 25th I will...
o be celebrating Christmas, you fucking scrooge 30%
o be celebrating the birth of our Lord and Savior Jesus the Christ 6%
o be celebrating Saturnalia 7%
o be working 7%
o be getting ready for Kwanza 1%
o be in the middle of Hanukkah 9%
o playing WoW in my mom's basement 12%
o dressed up like Santa and molesting poor black kids at the local shelter (localroger poll option) 7%
o be airing greivances and having feats of strength in true Festivus style 15%

Votes: 63
Results | Other Polls

Related Links
o started in the 4th century
o existing
o seasonal celebrations
o Christmas tree
o gift giving
o feasting
o mistletoe
o Also by undermyne


Display: Sort:
Fuck Christmas, we aren't having it this year. | 99 comments (87 topical, 12 editorial, 0 hidden)
seems a bit extreme (3.00 / 4) (#5)
by 5 dolla on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 10:14:20 AM EST

my policy is gifts for the kids, since its fun for them and they can't buy stuff for themselves. Plus shopping for toys is kinda fun.

Adults have income and can therefore buy themselves something. I tell people their gift is that they don't have to spend anytime in crowded shopping malls looking for something for me. When I say that their eyes light up and they seem to appreciated that. And if you say something like "the time you'd ordinarily use shopping for gifts, spend that time with your family instead" people will think you're kind-hearted and won't call you a scrooge. And it is also the truth.

The rest of the stuff? well you said you aren't against thanksgiving. Once you diffuse the gift-giving situation, really what is the difference between thanksgiving and christmas? One has this strange tradition of sticking a tree in your house. The other has you feeling guilty over the treatment of natives and/or being angry about how the do-gooders want to spoil your fun by trying to make you feel guilty.

Why are you so upset about getting some time off work and eating copious amounts of turkey?

i sympathize with author (3.00 / 3) (#24)
by loteck on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 03:51:10 PM EST

only because i can imagine that if you took 100 random kids as a control group, ages 7-17, and told them they would be getting no presents for christmas, that you would have 100% negative response, ranging from bad attitudes to outright revolt and possibly physical violence. this percentage would only moderately chan

but hey as long as you're having fun and feeling good thats all that fucking matters to you, and pretty much everyone else, consequences be damned. dress it up with some fucking reindeer and sing some emotional songs and maybe you can chant your brain into total uselessness.
--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]

fucking laptop (none / 0) (#26)
by loteck on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 03:52:41 PM EST

"this percentage would only moderately change with adults 18-60, it seems."
--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]
Don't blame the laptop (2.00 / 2) (#31)
by Nimey on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 04:30:17 PM EST

for your retardedness.
--
Never mind, it was just the dog cumming -- jandev
You Sir, are an Ignorant Motherfucker. -- Crawford
I am arguably too manic to do that. -- Crawford
I already fuck my mother -- trane
Nimey is right -- Blastard
i am in complete agreement with Nimey -- i am a pretty big deal

[ Parent ]
you're right (3.00 / 2) (#32)
by loteck on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 04:36:06 PM EST

you're obviously contagious.
--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]
All I hear is "derp derp derp" $ (none / 1) (#34)
by Nimey on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 04:54:26 PM EST


--
Never mind, it was just the dog cumming -- jandev
You Sir, are an Ignorant Motherfucker. -- Crawford
I am arguably too manic to do that. -- Crawford
I already fuck my mother -- trane
Nimey is right -- Blastard
i am in complete agreement with Nimey -- i am a pretty big deal

[ Parent ]
they'd react the same (3.00 / 2) (#35)
by 5 dolla on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 04:55:52 PM EST

if you told them that they wouldn't get presents on their birthday. Also if you told teenagers the wouldn't get an allowance this week.

So? Kids like presents. is that really a shock? And yeah, some kids are spoilt. Doesn't mean we should deny all children everywhere a little bit of fun once a year.

[ Parent ]

haha all children everywhere (none / 0) (#39)
by loteck on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 05:17:18 PM EST

i have no doubt you actually believe that.
--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]
yeah I was being completely literal when I said (3.00 / 2) (#70)
by 5 dolla on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 07:54:06 PM EST

that.

[ Parent ]
"fuck natalie holloway" (2.00 / 5) (#6)
by circletimessquare on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 10:16:04 AM EST

the last great gasp of k5

to which all stories hence are but a pale attempt at imitation

at least this one is honest about its mimicry

alas, greatness only strikes once in this vein, in this theme

there are no more sacred cows to fuck

*sniff*


The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

jealous aren't you ~ (3.00 / 4) (#13)
by loteck on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 03:10:16 PM EST


--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]
depends. are you fucking a sacred cow? (none / 1) (#15)
by circletimessquare on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 03:18:03 PM EST



The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

[ Parent ]
that's an interesting question (3.00 / 3) (#18)
by loteck on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 03:42:30 PM EST

if not yet, i guess i would consider myself damn near to it.
--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]
I celebrate Wiccamas you insensitive clod (3.00 / 3) (#7)
by GhostOfTiber on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 11:54:39 AM EST


[Nimey's] wife's ass is my cocksheath. - undermyne

It's called Yule you insensitive clod (3.00 / 5) (#12)
by Wen Jian on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 02:55:34 PM EST

This tinsel is symbolic of the human entrails that teh druids hung from teh trees...
It was an experiment in lulz. - Rusty
[ Parent ]
(3) clods, clods everywhere (3.00 / 3) (#20)
by loteck on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 03:44:14 PM EST


--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]
World's longest apology for being lazy...[] (3.00 / 3) (#10)
by mirleid on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 02:02:34 PM EST



Chickens don't give milk
topical relevance (3.00 / 5) (#17)
by loteck on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 03:36:01 PM EST

the only thing missing from this treatise is to draw a direct connection between the christmas climax and this planet's current financial crisis. it is during this time of year that we can most easily glimpse the insolvency of a consumer economy driven by borrowing more than you can pay, both on a personal and corporate level.

i am buying on credit, from a company that is retailing on credit, who got it shipped from a company that operates on credit, who shipped it from a manufacturer that made it on credit, which they obtained from a government that is giving that credit by going into debt. those governments are held up by a few dozen companies that operate up to their long-nosehairs in debt, and the length of that nosehair is the measure of the room that our global system has for mistakes.

so please, yes, fuck christmas in the eye. all its religious, commercial and other varied "symbols" developed by marketing companies are a crock of shit meant to elicit an emotional reaction from a completely zombified public. it is exactly like church, even down to the traditional music that you are programmed to respond to. the only real benefit to the season is that companies shut down for a couple of days and give people the chance to actually focus on their families , which makes it a convenient time for families that are hopelessly fragmented and strained to shore up for another year of neglect by actually spending time together.

of course it is at that point that those families realize that they have no idea who the people in their family actually are, what they do, or where they are at in life, so they awkwardly get lists from eachother that spell out the random plastic shit that each one has been programmed to want, which makes each member feel like they've contributed positively towards their family members, but that's only if everyone buys into that bullshit at the same time.

that people think christmas (let's say, 2% of the year) is a time for family and friends is simply a sad admission that 98% of life is not about those things and is about chasing shit around the block that wouldn't matter even if you could catch it, which, by the way, you can't.
--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

change "long nose hairs" (none / 1) (#42)
by Ruston Rustov on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 06:55:02 PM EST

to "long Jew nose hairs" and I'll vote to FP.

RON PAUL RLOVEUTION!

I had had incurable open sores all over my feet for sixteen years. The doctors were powerless to do anything about it. I told my psychiatrist that they were psychosomatic Stigmata - the Stigmata are the wounds Jesus suffered when he was nailed to the cross. Three days later all my sores were gone. -- Michael Crawford
Maybe tomorrow. -- Michael Crawford
As soon as she has her first period, fuck your daughter. -- localroger

[ Parent ]
my life isn't like that at all (none / 0) (#61)
by totmacher on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 02:52:32 PM EST

but maybe yours is

connecting with your family isn't hard, stop being such a bitch

-- I'll sum it up for yo: You = Douche bag ~ Butthurtapotamus
[ Parent ]

well obviously (3.00 / 2) (#65)
by loteck on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 05:36:35 PM EST

since your life isn't like that, this whole discussion is completely moot.

take down this article for the sake of this one retarded nullo, rusty, you have to.
--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]

so I suppose you'll be going in to work? (2.50 / 6) (#19)
by lonelyhobo on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 03:43:37 PM EST

wouldn't want to take a day off for a fake holiday you don't believe in, right?

Oh, you're taking the day off?  Then shut the fuck up and do christmas-y shit, you fucking hypocrite.

i dont think anyone has a problem (none / 0) (#23)
by loteck on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 03:46:03 PM EST

with the idea of holidays.

the idea of christmas, however...
--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]

if you're taking a holiday for it (2.33 / 3) (#25)
by lonelyhobo on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 03:51:31 PM EST

Then you're treating it special, and trying to pretend that you aren't is fucking absurd.

And what kind of supreme douchebag do you have to be to not be happy to have an excuse to give and receive presents to/from your friends and family?  I mean, I'm the supreme-iest douchebag of the douchebags, someone who isn't catholic or christian or any other religion, and I'm perfectly fine with christmas.

You think he celebrates valentine's day?  That's just as made up and absurd bullshit as christmas.

[ Parent ]

who needs an excuse? (3.00 / 3) (#27)
by loteck on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 04:06:30 PM EST

you shouldnt need an excuse to gift those you love unless you are a fucking failure in your family relationships, which most people are. there are 365 days in the year to show those you care about that you really care about, in all kinds of ways, including gifting. pretending like throwing a bunch of plastic shit at your 'family' at the end of the year means that you care about them is total sham, it is a retardation of the idea of family and friends, it has nothing to do with anything other than making yourself feel better and obeying what they tell you to do on TV.

for most people, holidays are defined by time they can get away from work. that's a holiday. whatever the popularly celebrated meaning for that holiday is may or may not be observed by each individual, who is just happy to have that time away from work.

if i had to guess, i would bet the extent of undermyne celebrating valentine's day is impregnating his wife in the tub. again.
--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]

oh what a crock of crap (2.00 / 2) (#28)
by lonelyhobo on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 04:10:58 PM EST

you answer your own question of "who needs an excuse" with "most people".  Most people are busy, and having a time where it's generally accepted everyone's work will stop and you can be with your family isn't a bad thing.  Acting like you can just coordinate a get-together with 10 or 20 or even more people who live in different places without having that universally declared time off is completely fatuous.

[ Parent ]
who said anything about getting together (3.00 / 2) (#29)
by loteck on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 04:22:21 PM EST

weren't you just telling me all the virtues of buying random shit for all these people you apparently wouldn't even recognize on the street if they didn't show up to the predetermined place once a year?

its fine man, enjoy the farce, nobody will deny it to you. but its all a big giant wanking farce no matter, irrespective of widely held denial.

for my part, i will make the trip out to see the fam, because they have time off and so do i. happy to see everyone and catch up. i needn't involve interntional politics, the human slave trade, the global financial crisis, or any of that other bullshit in this process any more than i have to to get me there. if any of the extended fam that i don't keep up with wants newfangled plastic shit, they can go make the decision to support the process behind getting it in their hands and buy it themselves if they want to. frankly the entire idea of the process makes me want to vomit on a the nearest christmas tree.
--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]

what the balls are you talking about (none / 0) (#44)
by lonelyhobo on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 07:52:13 PM EST

did you just agree with me while saying I'm wrong at the same time

because I think you did

[ Parent ]

+3 Encourage for the use of fatuous. n/t (none / 0) (#51)
by Calalily on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 12:50:14 AM EST



We are maggots tunneling through a rotting corpse. Parent ]
No Valentines Day $ (none / 0) (#37)
by undermyne on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 04:57:29 PM EST



"You're an asshole. You are the greatest troll on this site." Some nullo [ Parent ]
FAIL (none / 0) (#36)
by undermyne on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 04:56:44 PM EST

working. Might actually get some shit done for a change too.

"You're an asshole. You are the greatest troll on this site." Some nullo [ Parent ]
who the fuck is open on christmas (none / 1) (#45)
by lonelyhobo on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 07:58:43 PM EST

what do you work in walmart or a gas station or something

[ Parent ]
Wal-Mart (none / 0) (#49)
by Nimey on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 08:59:49 PM EST

redneck capital of the world.
--
Never mind, it was just the dog cumming -- jandev
You Sir, are an Ignorant Motherfucker. -- Crawford
I am arguably too manic to do that. -- Crawford
I already fuck my mother -- trane
Nimey is right -- Blastard
i am in complete agreement with Nimey -- i am a pretty big deal

[ Parent ]
I'm a computer janitor, I have a keyfob $ (none / 1) (#50)
by undermyne on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 10:37:58 PM EST



"You're an asshole. You are the greatest troll on this site." Some nullo [ Parent ]
I can't believe you -1'd me (none / 0) (#38)
by undermyne on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 05:02:36 PM EST

I put that localroger poll in just for yuo.

And tiber too. My faith in the world is shaken.

"You're an asshole. You are the greatest troll on this site." Some nullo [ Parent ]
if it makes you feel any better (none / 0) (#43)
by lonelyhobo on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 07:27:45 PM EST

I didn't read it.  Or look at the poll.

Democracy at work.

[ Parent ]

Props (2.00 / 2) (#21)
by QuantumFoam on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 03:44:40 PM EST

I'll have to wait for various people to die to achieve the same, but that's what I hope to do eventually. In addition to all the stuff you cite, I'm pretty sure that Christmas was commercialized fairly recently, like maybe the 1800s.

- Barack Obama: Because it will work this time. Honest!

Oh yeah WIPO (none / 1) (#22)
by QuantumFoam on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 03:45:42 PM EST

Isaac Newton's birthday.

- Barack Obama: Because it will work this time. Honest!

I'm not alone (3.00 / 3) (#30)
by slohandave on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 04:29:52 PM EST

This year, with the economy being so bad, we (wife, all the kids over 15) cancelled xmas for everyone but my youngest.  It might be nice to not have to look at huge CC bills all spring and summer, so we're all not getting each other anything.  We figured it out and it saves us about $1500.00 in mostly useless crap that no one wants or uses.

So I say, call me a scrooge, at least he wasn't broke!

how old is the youngest? ~ (none / 0) (#33)
by loteck on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 04:38:53 PM EST


--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]
The economy is crashing and it's HIS FAULT--> (3.00 / 2) (#69)
by localroger on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 07:51:37 PM EST

We have a great deal on torches and pitchforks, 15% off with purchase of lighter fluid and oil.

And that is what is so great about the internet. It enables pompous blowhards to connect with other pompous blowhards in a vast circle jerk of pomposity
[ Parent ]
Your fault? Cut yourself a little slack (none / 0) (#90)
by The Vast Right Wing Conspiracy on Sun Jan 04, 2009 at 02:12:39 PM EST

I only blame you for ruining K5, not the economy.

___
I'm a pompous windbag, I take myself far too seriously, and I single-handedly messed up K5 by causing the fiction section to be created. --localroger

[ Parent ]
The Internet's Christmas Gift To Make (none / 0) (#47)
by MichaelCrawford on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 08:29:10 PM EST

Every Christmas my AdSense skyrockets just for that one day, as all the little kiddies who get MP3 players hit The Series Of Tubes looking for music downloads.


--

Live your fucking life. Sue someone on the Internet. Write a fucking music player. Like the great man Michael David Crawford has shown us all: Hard work, a strong will to stalk, and a few fries short of a happy meal goes a long way. -- bride of spidy


Oopsy! s/Gift to Make/Gift to Mike/ $ (none / 0) (#48)
by MichaelCrawford on Mon Dec 22, 2008 at 08:29:36 PM EST


--

Live your fucking life. Sue someone on the Internet. Write a fucking music player. Like the great man Michael David Crawford has shown us all: Hard work, a strong will to stalk, and a few fries short of a happy meal goes a long way. -- bride of spidy


[ Parent ]

Solution: Become a Jehovah Witness or (3.00 / 2) (#52)
by Calalily on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 01:11:24 AM EST

just tell people you are and you never have to celebrate any holiday ever again, including secretary and boss's day and stuff like that.
Wiki:Celebrations, Weddings, anniversaries, and funerals are observed, however holidays such as New Year's Day, Easter, Halloween, Christmas, and birthdays are not celebrated, as Jehovah's Witnesses believe these customs come from ancient false religions.

I'm not sure about Thanksgiving though.

Glad I could be of help.

We are maggots tunneling through a rotting corpse.

But then I have to deal with... (none / 1) (#56)
by undermyne on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 10:17:30 AM EST

"you are a Jehovah's Witness??!!" which would never work for me because I drink like a fish and swear alot.

One of my buddies is always offering to get me a subscription to The Watchtower.

"You're an asshole. You are the greatest troll on this site." Some nullo [ Parent ]
Remember Mel Gibson in "Air America"? (none / 0) (#78)
by alba on Thu Dec 25, 2008 at 11:13:35 AM EST

"I never said I was a good Buddhist."

Substitute where appropriate.

[ Parent ]

ACK (2.66 / 3) (#53)
by dhk on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 04:25:09 AM EST

You nearly perfectly describe what I'm doing for some years now, only that I in addition refuse to care about birthdays. Sure enough my kids are old enough to enjoy this paradigm, too, and I concede that if it were otherwise I'd might have a problem. However, the most important thing is that you reserve the rest of the year for giving presents to the people you really care about. And it is easy for the recipients to appreciate it because it was not dictated by the date.

Since somebody mentioned that most people are too busy during the year to make presents: Yes, this surely is the case. But it is also undeniable proof that they value other things (job, holiday trips, washing their cars, work in the garden, organize barbecues......) more than their personal relationships. Which is perfectly OK but, then, giving presents just because you're expected to is downright hypocritical.
It's as easy as that.
- please forgive my bad english, I'm not a native speaker
You have hit the nail on the head. (none / 1) (#54)
by undermyne on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 10:13:58 AM EST

My sentiments exactly.

"You're an asshole. You are the greatest troll on this site." Some nullo [ Parent ]
+1 FP, Catholics burn in hell with fags (3.00 / 2) (#55)
by zombie Fred Phelps on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 10:17:01 AM EST



GOD HATES CATHOLICS $ (1.50 / 2) (#57)
by undermyne on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 10:20:46 AM EST



"You're an asshole. You are the greatest troll on this site." Some nullo [ Parent ]
ERIS LOVES TROLLS $ (1.50 / 2) (#77)
by Nimey on Wed Dec 24, 2008 at 11:01:56 PM EST


--
Never mind, it was just the dog cumming -- jandev
You Sir, are an Ignorant Motherfucker. -- Crawford
I am arguably too manic to do that. -- Crawford
I already fuck my mother -- trane
Nimey is right -- Blastard
i am in complete agreement with Nimey -- i am a pretty big deal

[ Parent ]
meh... (none / 1) (#58)
by yellow shark on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 10:40:30 AM EST



Christmas is... (none / 1) (#59)
by rusty on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 10:45:57 AM EST

...a celebration of whatever you want it to be. It's the great big glueball of winter holidays. I'm an atheist, so I don't care much about the whole "Jesus's birthday" angle. But around the shortest day of the year, or specifically very soon after, when you know the days are going to start getting longer again, I need to celebrate. Otherwise it would be an unbearably grim time of year.

So I'm celebrating the solstice (in a sort of psychological way, not a pseudo-pagan mystical way) and the beginning of real winter, when the cold and misery at least have an acceptable and expected role to play.

____
Not the real rusty

Moo (none / 0) (#60)
by unknownlamer on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 01:42:22 PM EST

We celebrate solstice (aka let's burn a fucking goat and drink mead around it).

And then get free food on xmas.

Works out pretty well.


--
<vladl> I am reading the making of the atomic bong - modern science
you're a brat, fuck off and die (2.00 / 7) (#62)
by totmacher on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 03:01:35 PM EST

if you don't wanna celebrate christmas, fine, you made your decision, live with it and move on

but instead you come on here, like a petulant child crying in the candy store, to whine about whatever the fuck, because apparently that's the modus operandi here on k5

and challenging it for the sake of challenging it is a bullshit reason if you don't put forth something better... so you're frustrated with shit, so the fuck what does that have to do with anything. make a decision, stick with it and shut the fuck up, no one wants to hear your rationale, because it sounds like whining to the rest of us

so merry christmas and happy new year, i'm sure you'll be back in this hole next year, hating on your family for petty shit as usual and being a miserable sonofabitch

-- I'll sum it up for yo: You = Douche bag ~ Butthurtapotamus

WELCOME NULLO $ (1.50 / 2) (#63)
by undermyne on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 05:12:37 PM EST



"You're an asshole. You are the greatest troll on this site." Some nullo [ Parent ]
ah the christmas devout (3.00 / 5) (#64)
by loteck on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 05:21:35 PM EST

so full of love and cheer this time of season... really makes me rethink my whole position.
--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]
whole position on what? (none / 1) (#67)
by totmacher on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 06:22:00 PM EST

all you have is an anti-. i never said i was pro-christmas. but the whole challenging it to piss off people? grow up. if you don't like them, lose their phone numbers and change yours, you fucking baby

-- I'll sum it up for yo: You = Douche bag ~ Butthurtapotamus
[ Parent ]
angsty on the internet (3.00 / 2) (#71)
by loteck on Wed Dec 24, 2008 at 01:31:34 AM EST

don't worry, it begins to wane when you start growing pubic hair.
--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]
i'm not the one not celebrating christmas cause (none / 1) (#75)
by totmacher on Wed Dec 24, 2008 at 11:48:46 AM EST

I hate my family :) whatever bullshit reasons you wanna concot around it is a load of trollop

-- I'll sum it up for yo: You = Douche bag ~ Butthurtapotamus
[ Parent ]
neat (2.66 / 6) (#66)
by packMule on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 06:07:30 PM EST

kidding..  You are a bad parent.

ROR, my parents did that too (1.50 / 2) (#68)
by Hiphopopotamus on Tue Dec 23, 2008 at 07:02:28 PM EST

Turns out it was a retarded idea by almost-hippies. ror
_________________

I'm In LOVE!

whoopsie daisy! (none / 0) (#72)
by catmatic on Wed Dec 24, 2008 at 08:01:54 AM EST

You got it backwards, Homey.  Christmas is real, but Jesus isn't.  

Oops!

Meh (none / 0) (#73)
by Jesus Christ Himself on Wed Dec 24, 2008 at 10:29:25 AM EST

I'm not religious at all but I like eating, and the giving of a single, nice gift to close friends and family (about 7 people for me) is nice. I don't want tons of presents, expensive or otherwise, but that bottle of whisky (I know you've just go into it and this is one of the malts that makes up the blend you like), or interesting book (you said you were wondering what to read next) are well received. Doing it for the sake of it is crap though, and the consumerist aspect goes over the to. I won't spend more than about 20 pounds per person, maybe 40-50 max on immediate family, because it's unnecessary.

--------------------------------------
Bless you my child.
My family kinda does this... (none / 0) (#74)
by laird on Wed Dec 24, 2008 at 10:35:59 AM EST

My family (parents, siblings) is (extremely reformed) Jewish, and live all over the country, so we celebrate Hanukkah on Thanksgiving, and focus on food and family. As my family is all fairly poor (artists and musicians lead cool lives, but don't have much cash) we generally only give presents to the kids. This year we did a pig picking at the beach. Admittedly roast pork, hushpuppies, etc., aren't terribly kosher, but they taste great. But then, my family used to eat sausage, egg and cheese biscuits on the way to Sunday Temple.

My wife and her family are Christians, so we celebrate Christmas with them, and there's more of a tradition of spending money on stuff for people. To limit the spending, we assign every family one other family to buy for, and generally focus on buying stuff for the kids.

One advantage of this weird scheme is that we never have to figure out whose house to go to for Christmas, which appears to be a fairly angst-ridden issue for many families where parents live far apart.

You sick bastard (none / 0) (#84)
by Joe Sixpack on Mon Dec 29, 2008 at 02:55:00 PM EST

Who eats biscuits with any combination of sausage, egg or cheese?

---
[ MONKEY STEALS THE PEACH ]
[ Parent ]

why not just secret santa with your family? (none / 0) (#76)
by the77x42 on Wed Dec 24, 2008 at 06:13:57 PM EST

instead you are just going to alienate your children.


"We're not here to educate. We're here to point and laugh." - creature
"You have some pretty stupid ideas." - indubitable ‮

I can attest to this being true (none / 0) (#86)
by Hiphopopotamus on Tue Dec 30, 2008 at 01:47:03 PM EST


_________________

I'm In LOVE!
[ Parent ]

That's pretty mean to your kids (3.00 / 3) (#79)
by Big Sexxy Joe on Thu Dec 25, 2008 at 02:04:44 PM EST

Anyway, even Richard Dawkins celebrates Christmas.

As a single man, I do little for Christmas.  But that's okay because I don't have children, dickhole.

I'm like Jesus, only better.
Democracy Now! - your daily, uncensored, corporate-free grassroots news hour

nothing weird here, sounds like you're a (none / 1) (#80)
by yellow shark on Thu Dec 25, 2008 at 10:50:49 PM EST

Jehovah's Witness to me.

it's not about christians or pagans (none / 1) (#81)
by circletimessquare on Sun Dec 28, 2008 at 11:39:23 AM EST

it's psychological

before it was christmas, before it was even saturnalia, humankind had an important thing to do in the dead of winter on the solstice: use mass delusion to remind himself that summer and bountiful harvests will come someday again

and how does one do that? how does one dispel the winter gloom and panic?

excessive displays of crass consumption

no, really. read up on the history of winter solstice celebrations. the whole point is mass counterprogramming: act like your crops just came in when there are no more crops for a very long time. its psychologically effective

all you assholes running around talking about removing the commercialism from christmas, or you, a special kind of asshole who doesn't celebrate christmas just because you are an asshole, actually miss the whole fucking point of christmas and winter solstice celebrations more than anyone else

it's psychological: anti-seasonal affective disorder via mass delusion


The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

You repeat yourself often. (3.00 / 2) (#82)
by grargrargrar on Mon Dec 29, 2008 at 06:31:31 AM EST

That's a crazy person speech pattern. Ergo(t?), you're a whacko. Which makes it aggravating when the subtance of your argument makes perfect sense.

[ Parent ]
i ascribe to the philosophy (1.50 / 2) (#83)
by circletimessquare on Mon Dec 29, 2008 at 08:58:56 AM EST

that, for utter retards (aka, kuro5hin), one is not responsible for reinventing a good argument everytime. copypasta does just fine

besides, who the fuck is reading me that closely?

well, obviously you are. in which case, you need to take a good hard look in the mirror, and reassess your life priorities


The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

[ Parent ]

Just to clarify (none / 0) (#97)
by procrasti on Sat Jan 10, 2009 at 08:00:05 AM EST

you are saying your comments aren't worth reading?

Well, at least we agree on something.

-------
if i ever see the nickname procrasti again on this site or anywhere in my life, i want it to be in an OBITUARY -- CTS
doing my best at licking arseholes - may 2015 -- mirko
-------
Winner of Kuro5hin: April 2015
[ Parent ]

Zing! (none / 1) (#99)
by skim123 on Tue Jan 27, 2009 at 05:38:00 PM EST


Money is in some respects like fire; it is a very excellent servant but a terrible master.
PT Barnum


[ Parent ]
plz explain (none / 0) (#91)
by loteck on Sun Jan 04, 2009 at 08:23:23 PM EST

december is summer for half the world.
--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]
i'm sorry (none / 0) (#93)
by circletimessquare on Sun Jan 04, 2009 at 10:46:56 PM EST

that comment is beneath the minimum standards of intellectual charity for a response


The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

[ Parent ]
pretty rich coming from you ~ (3.00 / 3) (#94)
by loteck on Mon Jan 05, 2009 at 02:25:57 AM EST


--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

[ Parent ]
Christmas and family customs (none / 0) (#85)
by hatshepsut on Tue Dec 30, 2008 at 01:06:31 PM EST

Ye flipping gods you take this seriously. I don't care if you call it Christmas, Saturnalia, Festivus or whatever, having a time when you KNOW that the bulk of your family and friends will have holidays is a great time to see those who live too far away to see regularly. As for crass materialism/consumerism, I've never understood anyone who spent more than they could comfortably pay off when the next month's CC bill comes in the mail. I love having some time to see my family, eating a turkey (which we don't cook for ourselves based on the fact that a turkey is much too big for the two of us), having nice baked goods (I love baking, but see above regarding too much food for two people) etc.

"Christmas is catholic and we aren't" - I would argue that more non-catholics than catholics celebrate it, so this doesn't hold much water.

"Christmas is pagan and we aren't" - Please, make up your mind! Are you not celebrating because you aren't catholic or not celebrating because you aren't pagan? Whatever.

"We have enough stuff" - So do we. Strangely enough there are many things you can do for the people you love that don't involve buying stuff. You can call these things "presents" or not, as you choose.

"we challenge it" - This appears to be the heart of the matter. Congratulations, you have annoyed your in-laws. The last time I saw someone do something for the express purpose of annoying someone else, it was a 6 year old...

Celebrate or don't, but be honest about it. I very much doubt, based on your comments, that religion has anything to do with the matter. You don't want to exchange gifts, and you want to annoy your in-laws. May your family show you more generosity of spirit than you appear to be showing them.

Well isn't this just a big bag of fail (none / 0) (#87)
by ksandstr on Wed Dec 31, 2008 at 08:00:59 AM EST

You've certainly got the "fuck everyone else" attitude down, as is right and proper. What I don't understand is how come you go with the least fun option of no ecksmas at all. You could've been eating pig and making teh merry but instead you did the Jehovah's Witness thing of sitting around in the dark having as little fun as possible.

It's not like 90% of so-called christians took any of that shit seriously on a day-to-day basis. Why should celebrations be any different? Are you letting them get under your skin or something?

Anyway, here's to hoping you at least know how to celebrate the beginning of the new year. In some parts of the world that was the major wintertime celebration until protestantism showed up and turned it into the "lesser", or "second christmas".

Fin.

Understanding peoples' reactions (none / 1) (#88)
by redelm on Fri Jan 02, 2009 at 06:21:57 PM EST

Whenever doing/saying something potentially controversial, I find it useful to remember that peoples' reactions are a combination of two very separate things: 1) My act/words; and 2) Their interpretation. Where I am convinced (1) is reasonable, then any unreasonableness must lie in (2).

I don't look too hard to explain other peoples' interpreations. How could anyone possibly know enough? And there are many different ways to go wrong.

But, man, WTF: Lights?:)



Not only lights ... (none / 0) (#95)
by icastel on Tue Jan 06, 2009 at 01:24:32 PM EST

... They also had a "nice dinner"! If that's not celebrating, I don't know what is.


-- I like my land flat --
[ Parent ]
its okay (none / 0) (#89)
by /dev/trash on Fri Jan 02, 2009 at 06:30:37 PM EST

Jesus stillloves you.

---
Updated 02/20/2004
New Site
you're obviously ahead of the curve on this one (none / 0) (#92)
by loteck on Sun Jan 04, 2009 at 08:29:25 PM EST

the only coherent argument put forward in all these comments is that most everyone gets time off during the xmas holiday, so its good times to see folks who live far away, which is true, if you call getting assraped on airfare "good times". apparently some folks have a hard time grasping what it costs to fly 6 people internationally during the holiday season. hint: i would guess for the average kuron, its about 2 months salary.

good times.
--
"You're in tune to the musical sound of loteck hi-fi, the musical sound that moves right round. Keep on moving ya'll." -Mylakovich
"WHAT AN ETERNAL MOBIUS STRIP OF FELLATIATIC BANALITY THIS IS." -Harry B Otch

Many of my coleagues don't celebrate Christmas (none / 0) (#96)
by buford on Wed Jan 07, 2009 at 03:23:25 AM EST

Just move to India or something and get it over with.

if a man zeros you, he is a spastic with the scroll wheel, and should be pitied.
all Christmas gifts will be given to charity...NO! (none / 0) (#98)
by leukhe on Mon Jan 19, 2009 at 11:38:25 AM EST

You should nog spend it anywhere if you want to make a point.

You decide to give up on christmas, and in the end you decide to buy off the bad feeling of not giving by spending it on charity.

charity is big business today, don't forget that!

if you want to do a good deed, then do it on a different date, it might be more needed on a diferent date. all homeless that you can find are fed on getmus day. do something on a different day.

By the way, don't forget that the number of suicides is highest in that period of the year.

Fuck Christmas, we aren't having it this year. | 99 comments (87 topical, 12 editorial, 0 hidden)
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