Kuro5hin.org: technology and culture, from the trenches
create account | help/FAQ | contact | links | search | IRC | site news
[ Everything | Diaries | Technology | Science | Culture | Politics | Media | News | Internet | Op-Ed | Fiction | Meta | MLP ]
We need your support: buy an ad | premium membership

[P]
Crawford Cliff Notes

By Zombie Tyler Durden in Meta
Thu Aug 18, 2011 at 07:50:55 AM EST
Tags: (all tags)

Printed and distributed under the GNU license for those who do not want to read a 4,396 word diatribe.

See below the fold.


PARAGRAPH 1: BEING ON DISABILITY SUCKS
PARAGRAPH 2: SHIT BE JACKED
PARAGRAPH 3 AND 4: PEOPLE NEVER LEAVE DISABILITY
PARAGRAPH 5: CANADIANS ARE MENTALLY ILL
PARAGRAPH 6: BUT NOT CRAWFORD
PARAGRAPH 7: CANADIANS ARE ALSO ON THE DOLE
PARAGRAPH 8: "FUCK THAT"
PARAGRAPH 9: TIMES WERE HARD FINANCIALLY FOR CRAWFORD IN NOVA SCOTIA
PARAGRAPH 10: OTHER DR'S THINK HE SHOULD GO ON DISABILITY
PARAGRAPH 11: AN EXAMPLE OF SUCH A DOCTOR, DATING BACK TO 1994
PARAGRAPH 12: PASCAL AND C ARE DIFFERENT
PARAGRAPH 13 AND 14: HE HAD A SERIOUS DEADLINE, AND SERIOUS HALLUCINATIONS
PARAGRAPH 15: THE PEOPLE AT THE  WASHINGTON HOSPITAL ARE A BUNCH OF FAGGOTS.
PARAGRAPH 16: CRAWFORD NEEDED GA-X MONEY TO LEAVE THE HOSPITAL
PARAGRAPH 17: CRAWFORD AGREED, BUT ONLY UNDER DURESS.
PARAGRAPH 18: CRAWFORD TELLS SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T CARE ABOUT HIS IPHONE APP
PARAGRAPH 19: SOMEONE ELSE LIED AND SO CRAWFORD GOT GA-X MONEY
PARAGRAPH 20: RE-ITERATION ABOUT DURESS
PARAGRAPH 21 AND 22: SOME CUNT FROM DSHS IS UP IN CRAWFORD'S SHIT
PARAGRAPH 23: CRAWFORD WAS TOO BUSY WITH HIS APP TO REPLY OT THE CUNT
PARAGRAPH 24: WARPED LIFE IS GOING TO BE SWEET WHEN IT RELEASES
PARAGRAPH 25: APPS ARE REVIEWED BY APPLE, BUT APPLE EMPLOYS FAGGOT REVIEWERS
PARAGRAPH 26: THEY MIGHT BE NIGGERS TOO
PARAGRAPH 27: OK NOW WE'RE BACK TO THE GA-X MONEY
PARAGRAPH 28: MICHAEL WANTS TO CANCEL THE GA-X MONEY
PARAGRAPH 29: CUNT DISAGREES
PARAGRAPH 30: SHIT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE
PARAGRAPH 31: CRAWFORD CAN PAY FOR HIS SHIT HIMSELF
PARAGRAPH 32: CRAWFORD IS CONCERNED ABOUT THE FINANCIAL STATUS OF WASHINGTON STATE
PARAGRAPH 33: HE ADMITS TO COMMITTING FRAUD, BUT UNDER DURESS
PARAGRAPH 34: CUNT ISN'T HAVING CRAWFORD'S SHIT
PARAGRAPH 35: "WHAT THE FUCK?"
PARAGRAPH 36-38: BOLDED, BULLET POINTS. (LOL)
PARAGRAPH 39: WASHINGTON DOES NOT HAVE A STATE INCOME TAX
PARAGRAPH 40: THE POOR ARE GETTING SCREWED IN WA
PARAGRAPH 41: SHIT'S NOT MAKING SENSE
PARAGRAPH 42: WA NEEDS A STATE INCOME TAX
PARAGRAPH 43: REPUBLICANS SUCK
PARAGRAPH 44: REPUBLICANS ARE KILLING SCHOOLS IN WA
PARAGRAPH 45: CRAWFORD STATES HE THINKS HE IS A DOLLAR SIGN TO THE STATE
PARAGRAPH 46: CRAWFORD TRIES TO REASON WITH THEM OVER AND OVER TO NO AVAIL
PARAGRAPH 47-49: THIS IS ALL A WASTE OF MONEY
PARAGRAPH 50: SCHOOLTEACHERS ARE GETTING LAID OFF.
PARAGRAPH 51: "Have you ever signed the front of a paycheck?"
PARAGRAPH 52: CRAWFORD IS SELF-EMPLOYED, YOU SEE
PARAGRAPH 53: CRAWFORD PAYS HIS TAXES AND OWES THE IRS MONEY
PARAGRAPH 54: PHILOSOPHICAL MUMBLINGS OF WHAT IS A SALARY
PARAGRAPH 55: IRS IS FULL OF NIGGERS
PARAGRAPH 56: HARSH PENALTIES EXIST FOR NOT PAYING THE IRS
PARAGRAPH 57: FINANCIAL HARDSHIPS ABOUND, MOSTLY BECAUSE THE IRS IS FULL OF NIGGERS
PARAGRAPH 58: SINCE HE OWES THE IRS A TON, HE CAN SPEAK FROM AUTHORITY ABOUT THE FAGGOTS AT THE WA HOSPITAL
PARAGRAPH 59-61: HOMELESS PEOPLE CAN BE MENTALLY ILL
PARAGRAPH 62: THEIR SYMPTOMS ARE SERIOUS
PARAGRAPH 63: MICHAEL IS A GREAT CODER AND NOT DISABLED
PARAGRAPH 64: SHIT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE
PARAGRAPH 65-67: THIS BITCH DEMANDS AN APPOINTMENT WITH CRAWFORD. CRAWFORD IS A BUSY BUSINESS MAN.
PARAGRAPH 68: "I AM RUNNING A FUCKING BUSINESS."
PARAGRAPH 69-70: HE'S GOING TO WEAR HIS SUIT TO THE MEETING WITH THE CUNT
PARAGRAPH 71: CRAWFORD THINKS HE LOOKS HOT IN THE SUIT
PARAGRAPH 72: HE SELECTED THE SUIT CAREFULLY
PARAGRAPH 73: FANTASIES OF VERBAL ABUSE AGAINST THE CUNT
PARAGRAPH 74: CRAWFORD'S RESUME IS 7 PAGES (LOL) AND HE'LL BRING IT WITH HIM.
PARAGRAPH 75: CRAWFORD WILL GET INDIGNANT WITH THE CUNT BECAUSE HE'S A BUSINESSMAN
PARAGRAPH 76: CRAWFORD'S BEEN PUSHED AROUND LONG ENOUGH.
PARAGRAPH 77: CRAWFORD'S "SKILLS" ON HIS RESUME GO ON FOR A PAGE AND A HALF (LOL)
PARAGRAPH 78: "THEN I TURN TO THE SECOND PAGE OF THE RESUME WHERE IT SAYS THAT I AM THE CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER OF DULCINEA TECHNOLOGIES CORPORATION..."
PARAGRAPH 79: THE CUNT WILL THEN SEE THE LIGHT OF DAY
PARAGRAPH 80: CRAWFORD WILL ATTEMPT TO JUSTIFY FRAUD WITH HIS DURESS ARGUMENT
PARAGRAPH 81: CRAWFORD IS SAD HE LOST SOFTWAREPROBLEM.ORG
PARAGRAPH 82: A BUNCH OF PEOPLE AT THE HOSPITAL ARE CONSPIRING TO COMMIT FRAUD
PARAGRAPH 83 AND 84: THEY BETTER KNOCK THAT SHIT OFF, OR CRAWFORD WILL SIC THE AUTHORITIES ON THEM.
PARAGRAPH 85: "They are too crazy, you see, to even know that they should ask."

Sponsors

Voxel dot net
o Managed Hosting
o VoxCAST Content Delivery
o Raw Infrastructure

Login

Related Links
o Also by Zombie Tyler Durden


Display: Sort:
Crawford Cliff Notes | 17 comments (15 topical, 2 editorial, 0 hidden)
HOLY SHIT 715 WORDS (2.76 / 13) (#1)
by Zombie Tyler Durden on Tue Aug 16, 2011 at 07:13:03 PM EST

16% OF THE ORIGINAL SIZE

THAT'S PRETTY FUCKING AMAZING FOR LOSSLESS COMPRESSION

DroPPiN Da DeuCe HarDz Kkk0re

+1FP VALUABLE PUBLIC SERVICE (3.00 / 5) (#3)
by lostincali on Tue Aug 16, 2011 at 09:49:08 PM EST


"The least busy day [at McDonalds] is Monday, and then sales increase throughout the week, I guess as enthusiasm for life dwindles."

+1 FP (none / 1) (#4)
by Brogdel on Tue Aug 16, 2011 at 11:06:25 PM EST

For not making me read anything 4,396 words on this site, yet still having the phrase: CANADIANS ARE MENTALLY ILL and CANADIANS ARE ALSO ON THE DOLE. All caps of course.

You brought a smile to my weary eyes. (2.25 / 4) (#5)
by Zombie Jesus Christ on Wed Aug 17, 2011 at 03:18:59 AM EST

It's just after midnight now.  I just got up and had some homemade chicken soup for breakfast.  I'll work through the night on Warp Life and be at the DSHS chick's office at nine-thirty sharp.

I'm impressed you went to all the trouble to write this.  That's a lot of work.

--
Mike Crawford for Clark County Commissioner
District 1 North County
mike@communard.org

Paid for by The Communard Party of Washington State


I never said I wasn't mentally ill (2.40 / 5) (#6)
by Zombie Jesus Christ on Wed Aug 17, 2011 at 03:41:48 AM EST

Of course I'm mentally ill.  What I'm saying is that I'm not mentally disabled.  That's quite a different thing.  There are lots of mentally ill people who work and have good jobs.

--
Mike Crawford for Clark County Commissioner
District 1 North County
mike@communard.org

Paid for by The Communard Party of Washington State


you don't think it's a spectrum? (none / 1) (#7)
by Morally Inflexible on Wed Aug 17, 2011 at 06:35:47 AM EST

from people who are 'not functioning at their full potential' down to 'mostly vegetative' - ?  

I mean, I've met and worked with several people diagnosed with autism;  Sure, they were extra nerdy and made social mistakes; they were impaired vs someone who was just as smart and skilled without the autism, but they were still skilled professionals who were able to provide for themselves in a comfortable manner.  

[ Parent ]

It's like being blind, or unable to walk. (1.50 / 2) (#8)
by Zombie Jesus Christ on Wed Aug 17, 2011 at 08:09:27 AM EST

Yes, mental illness is a disability but it does not prevent me from working.  If one is blind, one can work as a coder through the use of screen reades and Braille terminals.  Those in wheelchairs need wheelchair ramps or elevators to get to their offices.

For the most part the only accomodation I would ever require from an employer is to be allowed to work at night, and to have time off occasionally when I get hospitalized.  That's a lot cheaper than installing an elevator to accomodate a paraplegic.

The Americans With Disabilities act was passed specifically to get those with disabilities off the government dole and back to work.  It requires employers to provide "reasonable accomodations" to employees who request them, and forbids employers from discriminating against those with disabilities.

In particular, the ADA specifically names mental illness as a protected condition, and court precedent protects those with Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome.

--
Mike Crawford for Clark County Commissioner
District 1 North County
mike@communard.org

Paid for by The Communard Party of Washington State


[ Parent ]
Not all the time (1.50 / 2) (#9)
by Lexx Core on Wed Aug 17, 2011 at 01:03:51 PM EST

and contractors are usually exempt from protection that W-2 employees get.

If most of your life you earned a 1099 contractor wage, you won't be paying into FICA and other taxes and thus your social security and disability benefits will be lower than those who have. Process servers and debt collectors also suffer from that as well as they are usually 1099 contractors.

Your best bet is to stay on working until you are actually disabled and unable to work, but being in a hospital is not the same as being disabled.

Yes there is legal discrimination against the mentally ill, it is just hard to prove it without good expensive lawyers. If you win then you only earn one year's salary if you win and lawyers take 1/3rd of it for legal fees (but legal fees are tax deductible you won't get it all back).

Lawyers can help you with taxes as well to settle with the state or IRS to pay reduced taxes.

[ Parent ]

1099 contractors actually do pay Social Security (1.50 / 2) (#10)
by Zombie Jesus Christ on Wed Aug 17, 2011 at 03:18:10 PM EST

It's called the Self-Employment Tax.  It is twice the W-2 Social Security tax.  Half the Social Security tax is paid by the employee and half is paid by his employer.  Because 1099 contractors are their own employers, they pay both parts.

It's reported on the 1040 Schedule C business income form, with half of the Self-Employment tax being deductible on the 1040.

Yeah, it can be a bitch being a consultant because there are all kinds of legal protections that W-2 employees have that I don't have.

I have never been discriminated against by a client as a result of my disability.  What is a huge problem though is that dishonest clients are always trying to rip me off.  Often my checks are late if I get them at all.  

W-2 employees have all manner of legal protections against employers who fail to pay, but the best I could hope to do is to sue deadbeat clients.  I've considered this at times, but I've been advised by attorneys that unless I have a contract that says otherwise, I'd have to sue in my client's venue.  Sometimes just the travel cost to show up at a courthouse thousands of miles away is more than it's worth.

--
Mike Crawford for Clark County Commissioner
District 1 North County
mike@communard.org

Paid for by The Communard Party of Washington State


[ Parent ]
Correction: Reported on Schedule 1040 SE (2.00 / 3) (#11)
by Zombie Jesus Christ on Wed Aug 17, 2011 at 05:20:10 PM EST

If I recall correctly, the Schedule C has a line for the self-employment tax, but the tax itself is figured on the 1040 Schedule SE.

--
Mike Crawford for Clark County Commissioner
District 1 North County
mike@communard.org

Paid for by The Communard Party of Washington State


[ Parent ]
large corporations are /always/ late (none / 1) (#12)
by Morally Inflexible on Wed Aug 17, 2011 at 05:31:11 PM EST

when paying small suppliers.  Personally, my theory is that it's an asshole power thing, you know when you are in someones office and the phone starts to ring and they shush you, put their hand on the phone, then wait until the fourth ring before picking up?  same thing, I think.  I mean, I guess it could also be the float, but I can't imagine my $14K cheque making much difference to anyone really large.  But, I dono;  maybe when they have a lot of cheques to send of that size the float becomes worth making us angry?  who knows.  The point is that being late is completely normal and doesn't mean you won't get paid.  (of course, it means you are out two months salary rather than just one month if they do decide not to pay you)

Actually, there was a recent thread on hacker news about this;  apparently nearly everyone has had similar experiences when dealing with large companies[1]

So yeah, when it's your only income, it's hard to not freak out (I myself have kinda freaked out over this when I was younger.)  but the truth of the matter is that it's completely normal for large companies to make you wait, and it doesn't really indicate that they intend to leave you in the lurch.  

This is just part of the normal cost of business of being a supplier rather than an employee.  

[1]http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=2892878

[ Parent ]

Uh not getting checks (none / 1) (#16)
by Lexx Core on Thu Aug 18, 2011 at 10:19:34 AM EST

or getting them late is discrimination in a way. Only if others get them first before you do.

Yeah large companies rip off the contractors and subcontractors when they can or cut the checks late. I recall a few of my friends even got checks that they did not sign and when they asked the a/p guy to sign them he said "you sign them!" which as you know is fraud to sign someone else's checks and finally when he did sign them for my friends they where a few months late, so that is a delaying tactic I guess?

[ Parent ]

One doesn't have to sue over discrimination. (1.50 / 2) (#14)
by Zombie Jesus Christ on Wed Aug 17, 2011 at 06:34:12 PM EST

If I am discriminated against in such a way that I would have standing to sue, then the discrimination is almost certainly outlawed by the Americans with Disabilities Act.  If that's the case, one is actually not permitted to sue.  Instead one reports it to the government agency that deals with that kind of discrimination, and they sue on your behalf.

For employment discrimination, the Federal Equal Employment Opportunity commission would sue.  The EEOC is particularly vigorous about pressing ADA lawsuits.  Even though lawsuits cost a lot of money, the EEOC wins them consistently and has established all manner of precedent, thereby scaring the Hell out of employers that might consider discrimination.  

This enables the Feds to save far more money than the lawsuits cost, because it enables disabled people to get paying jobs rather than getting Social Security disability payments.

There is some other agency that handles housing discrimination.  I'm pretty sure the ADA also covers public accomodation, but I've never looked into that.  But you can better believe I've studied the parts of the ADA that concern employment discrimination.

--
Mike Crawford for Clark County Commissioner
District 1 North County
mike@communard.org

Paid for by The Communard Party of Washington State


[ Parent ]
Anyone can sue (none / 1) (#17)
by Lexx Core on Thu Aug 18, 2011 at 10:24:07 AM EST

or have the government sue for you, the hard part is proving it.

Employers and contracting agencies will cover themselves by documenting untrue stuff like you surf the Internet all day, or gossip with coworkers at the water cooler instead of working and pay off coworkers in raises and promotions to testify to it. Even if it is not true, they can build up a case against you to terminate you or use as a defense in case they get sued. Then they can treat you like Melvin from Office Space and do whatever they want to you.

[ Parent ]

tldr (3.00 / 2) (#15)
by channel on Wed Aug 17, 2011 at 09:40:11 PM EST



Crawford Cliff Notes | 17 comments (15 topical, 2 editorial, 0 hidden)
Display: Sort:

kuro5hin.org

[XML]
All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective companies. The Rest 2000 - Present Kuro5hin.org Inc.
See our legalese page for copyright policies. Please also read our Privacy Policy.
Kuro5hin.org is powered by Free Software, including Apache, Perl, and Linux, The Scoop Engine that runs this site is freely available, under the terms of the GPL.
Need some help? Email help@kuro5hin.org.
My heart's the long stairs.

Powered by Scoop create account | help/FAQ | mission | links | search | IRC | YOU choose the stories!