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TheSpark.com's Neural-Net Gender Test

By cp in MLP
Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 07:00:09 PM EST
Tags: etc (all tags)

The same fellows at TheSpark.com who brought you Stinky Meat have an online gender test you can take which functions by a sort of neural-net method. Though primarily intended for novelty purposes, this test has yielded remarkably accurate results: an informal survey on #kuro5hin indicates that most who took it are indeed borderline male, and Communista was refreshingly reassured: "whee! [You're] a girl!".


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This test yielded accurate results for me...
o Yes 81%
o No 13%
o Unsure 5%

Votes: 96
Results | Other Polls

Related Links
o Kuro5hin
o TheSpark.c om
o Stinky Meat
o gender test
o neural-net
o borderline
o Also by cp

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TheSpark.com's Neural-Net Gender Test | 35 comments (28 topical, 7 editorial, 0 hidden)
This reminds me of the old... (3.57 / 7) (#5)
by Seumas on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 05:39:10 PM EST

This reminds me of the old BBS door I played a couple times about a dozen years ago.

#>Think of an animal.
#>Does it have fur? (y/n): y
#>Does it live in groups? (y/n): n
#>Is it bigger than a man? (y/n):y
. . .

And so on, until it comes to conclude what your animal is. Usually pretty accuruately, too. And if it isn't, you tell it what the animal was and it recalls it the next time someone else plays.

There's also a more general version for various objects and things on the web that I've bumped into once or twice.

I guess it's interesting... if you like databases. Whoo DB's! ;)
I just read K5 for the articles.

That would be slightly cooler (none / 0) (#15)
by aphrael on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 08:13:03 PM EST

if it would tell me how many guesses it needed ...

[ Parent ]
and it would be even cooler... (none / 0) (#17)
by physicsgod on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 10:31:28 PM EST

If the questioning were optimized so that it could eliminate classes of animals with each question. e.g. if the answer to "does it have hair" is no, then eliminate all mammals...of course that would probably require rewriting the whole thing.

--- "Those not wearing body armor are hereby advised to keep their arguments on-topic" Schlock Mercenary
[ Parent ]
Sure (none / 0) (#19)
by aphrael on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 10:48:44 PM EST

but it should be able to increment a counter while it's walking down the tree, and then spit that back out at me.

[ Parent ]
That would tell you nothing of worth (none / 0) (#24)
by leviathan on Fri Feb 02, 2001 at 08:12:51 AM EST

That would tell you how many questions you have answered so far - which most people can do in their heads.

I wish everyone was peaceful. Then I could take over the planet with a butter knife.
- Dogbert
[ Parent ]
How many questions you've answered so far (none / 0) (#30)
by aphrael on Fri Feb 02, 2001 at 05:15:43 PM EST

Is exactly what i'm looking for; i'm not paying attention to count them while i'm answering them.

[ Parent ]
<DeeDee>Ooooooh</DeeDee> (3.00 / 1) (#13)
by ar0n on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 07:04:12 PM EST

That's neat!

This is probably great for explaining to someone how a binary tree works!

[ Parent ]
Even better... (none / 0) (#21)
by rusty on Fri Feb 02, 2001 at 05:18:36 AM EST

Even better than that is "Guess the Sitcom Character/Evil Dictator". You choose a sitcom character or an evil dictator, and answer questions till it guesses. Only on the internet...

Not the real rusty
[ Parent ]
That's nothing... (none / 0) (#31)
by fvw on Sat Feb 03, 2001 at 04:23:32 PM EST

Try <A HREF="http://www.20q.net/index.html>this.. Oh, btw. it appears posting html is b0rken.

[ Parent ]
Didja try (none / 0) (#32)
by rusty on Sat Feb 03, 2001 at 06:28:38 PM EST

Looks like you forgot to close your quotes in the HREF tag. It works for me.

Not the real rusty
[ Parent ]
Tried that (none / 0) (#33)
by fvw on Sun Feb 04, 2001 at 02:15:33 PM EST

I tried that, but as soon as I previewed the </A> disappeared... Let's try that again... goatsex.. It works now.. Don't know what you did, but good work :-). (*and there was much rejoicing*)

[ Parent ]
Try doing it as yourself :) (none / 0) (#34)
by Smiling Dragon on Sun Feb 04, 2001 at 10:23:45 PM EST

Instead of picking a character, answer as yourself.
I came out as Chandler Bing from Friends <grin>

-- Sometimes understanding is the booby prize - Neal Stephenson
[ Parent ]
looks oddly familiar (none / 0) (#28)
by Delirium on Fri Feb 02, 2001 at 02:44:52 PM EST

Haha this is IDENTICAL to a program I had to write for my freshman (college) CS class. It's a standard binary tree student problem and takes maybe 20 minutes to implement in C++.

[ Parent ]
They need an additional poll afterwards... (2.50 / 2) (#7)
by psyclone on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 06:20:49 PM EST

.. that askes at what point did you notice and read the small phrases surrounding the questions. I didn't notice until half-way through.

btw, it's pretty simple to build a neural net that only has two answers. My guess is that they have one input node for each question, 3-5 "hidden" nodes, and one output node.

oh yea, doesn't everyone want to fall to their death?

Well it obviously isn't perfect (3.80 / 5) (#9)
by kraant on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 06:48:11 PM EST

Silky Hair


Careful Primping

Well I've let myself go to seed lately but I try to


Well it's pointing at the cheeks so I guess so... I supposedly have good cheekbones

Heaving Chest


It all adds up... You are definitely a woman!

How do we know? Well, deep down, your gender affects everything about you, from your favorite number to your views on Canada. Using the previous takers of the Gender Test, our patented Geni-Tell technology has discovered the subtle, surprising differences between male and female

It's sooo obvious you're a chick.

*Looks down* *see's hairy legs* (ugh! Yuk) and lump in shorts

Nup definetly a guy

You know, for every question, we track very carefully what each gender answers. This allows us to guess with the utmost accuracy what you are. And in the rare case where we guess incorrectly (like now), we have the opportunity to learn from nature's mistake. You.

People like you, who walk the scary line between man and woman, are *very* helpful in understanding exactly what makes someone fucked up. Thanks, and good luck.

How rude...

"kraant, open source guru" -- tumeric
Never In Our Names...
hmm. it got me wrong too (3.00 / 1) (#11)
by renec on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 06:59:06 PM EST

Definately male, it says I'm definately a chick. Stupid thing.

[ Parent ]
or DID it?! (none / 0) (#27)
by Paul Dunne on Fri Feb 02, 2001 at 12:00:42 PM EST

Well, since computers can't lie, you're obviously a woman trapped in a man's body. Have you considered surgery?
[ Parent ]
i am a chick, damnit! (4.00 / 2) (#20)
by turtle on Fri Feb 02, 2001 at 02:18:33 AM EST

So what if I said Black Jack is a good name for a male porn star? How does that make me a man?

Well, I just flashed the site to prove my points...


"When you're right, you have no need to be angry. When you're wrong, you have no right to be angry." ~~ Mahatma Ghandi
[ Parent ]

Alright. (3.20 / 5) (#12)
by Phil the Canuck on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 07:03:59 PM EST

So I'm a guy. Terrific. I already knew that. So my question is, what's with the goat?


I don't think being an idiot comes with a pension plan though. Unless you're management of course. - hulver

neural net? (5.00 / 2) (#16)
by kei on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 09:36:15 PM EST

It looks to me like you could simply use Bayesian inference rules, no neural net needed. Just constantly refine your P(Answers|Gender) and P(Gender), and compile them together to get a P(Gender|Answers). Simple joint probability calculation.
"[An] infinite number of monkeys typing into GNU emacs would never make a good program."
- /usr/src/linux/Documentation/CodingStyle
Do you sleep on your stomach or on your back? (3.33 / 3) (#22)
by codemonkey_uk on Fri Feb 02, 2001 at 07:14:39 AM EST

That reminds me. A friend (female) of mine was asked my a guy in collage "Do you sleep on your stomach?", when she answerd no, he said "Can I?". Worst pick up line ever.

So thats:

  • Do you sleep on your stomach?
  • No.
  • Can I?
Thankyou, and goodnight.
"The most savage controversies are those about matters as to which there is no good evidence either way." - Bertrand Russell
Wheee! (1.00 / 1) (#23)
by Armaphine on Fri Feb 02, 2001 at 07:51:33 AM EST

I'm a boy!

Question authority. Don't ask why, just do it.

these guys are lazy students (2.00 / 1) (#25)
by mami on Fri Feb 02, 2001 at 10:21:05 AM EST

who look for some material to make their homeworks for some statistics classes fun...They got me wrong, I am not a chick, not a girl, not a woman, but a shortsighted old grandma...:-)

Umm... (3.33 / 3) (#26)
by Ken Arromdee on Fri Feb 02, 2001 at 10:59:39 AM EST

The population on the net isn't evenly distributed. Suppose that, say, 90% are male; in that case, the test could be 90% accurate simply by saying 'male' each time without computing or looking up anything at all. This can give a false impression of high accuracy.

except... (4.50 / 2) (#29)
by Ludwig on Fri Feb 02, 2001 at 05:02:23 PM EST

Except that their stats show 56% of the respondents claim to be female. Now, if it were #hottub or something, I would doubt the validity of the respondents' gender claims pretty strongly, but thespark.com is one of those links that receptionists and such email each other along with VIRUS ALERT!s and good-luck chain letters, so I'm inclined to believe that statistic.

[ Parent ]
This test is way more accurate!!! (none / 0) (#35)
by dagg on Mon Dec 09, 2002 at 01:24:47 AM EST

It's the Find Yer Sex Gateway. It said I was genitalia-less.
Find Yer Sex Gateway
TheSpark.com's Neural-Net Gender Test | 35 comments (28 topical, 7 editorial, 0 hidden)
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