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K5 Unveils Interactive Sucks-Rules-O-Meter

By rusty in MLP
Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 08:53:14 AM EST
Tags: You Know... (all tags)
You Know...

Doesn't it irk you when people make totally unprovable assertions like "Linux rules!" or "Perl sucks!" Don't you wish you could prove them wrong, once and for all? Well now you can! We've adapted the time-tested truth-determining powers of Don Marti's infamous Operating System Sucks-Rules-O-Meter to an easy-to-use interactive web format. Now you may simply consult the K5 Interactive Sucks-Rules-O-Meter anytime you need to prove or disprove assertions like:

Conundrums once thought to be intractable can now be solved at last. Truly, the internet is paving the way for a glorious, omniscient future!


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K5 Unveils Interactive Sucks-Rules-O-Meter | 36 comments (33 topical, 3 editorial, 0 hidden)
Daft as a brush (4.00 / 4) (#3)
by Aquarius on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 04:51:35 AM EST

This is unbelievably silly :-)

Personally, I reckon that some kind of K5 "daft toys" section might be good :)


"The grand plan that is Aquarius proceeds apace" -- Ronin, Frank Miller
The backstory (4.33 / 3) (#4)
by rusty on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 05:02:23 AM EST

Actually, someone posted on a mailing list that "MySQL sucks, because three DBAs I know said so". And someone else posted that MySQL sucked, but that wasn't why. And I thought I'd like to settle the question once and for all. So I adapted to OS SROM to check for MySQL, Postgres, and Oracle. Then it occurred to me that the code itself was pretty simple, and it might be neat to have a version that could test arbitrary items. Then it further occurred to me that I already have a website I could put this on, and that adding the code to Scoop would be a snap (boxes rule). And the rest is history.

And yes, I am feeling rather silly tonight.

Not the real rusty
[ Parent ]

Sad news (4.00 / 2) (#6)
by codemonkey_uk on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 05:10:18 AM EST

There must be a bug in the code, because while scoop rules, kuro5hin sucks, apparently.

Of course, slashdot sucks more.

No end of fun to be had ... even if it is nonsense... :)
"The most savage controversies are those about matters as to which there is no good evidence either way." - Bertrand Russell
[ Parent ]

Rusty numbers, and it must be handy (4.50 / 2) (#17)
by Aquarius on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 08:41:07 AM EST

Must be handy, just thinking "hey, I have all this space on K5, and everyone else will think it's a cool tool." :-)

Being slightly more serious about not being serious, this sort of thing is nice, I think. The idea of little K5 nicenesses helps with the whole community thing, because it's a shared experience idea.

One of the dafter ideas I had, which would be a nice K5 sort of a thing (it could be for scoop in general, but I think something this smart should be a K5 thing ;) is based around the mathematicians idea of an Erdos number. The way it works is that we define Paul Erdos (a mathematician and horrendously prolific writer of papers) to have Erdos number zero. People who co-authored a paper with him have Erdos number 1. Those who co-authored a paper with someone with Erdos number 1 have Erdos number 2, and so on. If there's no chain of co-authorships connecting someone with Erdos, their Erdos number is defined to be infinite.

What's good about this is that it could work for K5 followups. Let's say we want to calculate everyone's "Rusty number". If Rusty has followed up one of your postings, you have a Rusty number of 1. If Rusty followed up one of my postings (which he did, above), and I followed up one of your postings, then you have a Rusty number of 2, and so on. A new fun thing to calculate! And Rusty gets to write recursive SQL to implement it, too, ahahaha :-)

Aq -- home of the wild idea

"The grand plan that is Aquarius proceeds apace" -- Ronin, Frank Miller
[ Parent ]
Or rating/voting. (4.00 / 2) (#18)
by Seumas on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 08:55:55 AM EST

I can also see this somehow implemented in the Rating/Voting area of K5. That is, how often user X has rated a comment (or story?) by user Y. Perhaps somehow add a voting average in there?

You'd have to figure out some non-controversial way to apply it, but it could be cool.
I just read K5 for the articles.
[ Parent ]

Logging the searches (4.00 / 2) (#22)
by retinaburn on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 09:03:15 AM EST

Are you doing any logging of what searches are performed ?

Just for the record poo vs george w bush ...POO wins !!!! YES.

I think that we are a young species that often fucks with things we don't know how to unfuck. -- Tycho

[ Parent ]
At last I know the truth (3.66 / 3) (#5)
by codemonkey_uk on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 05:02:39 AM EST

As I once sugested in a diary entry, I Rule!
"The most savage controversies are those about matters as to which there is no good evidence either way." - Bertrand Russell
But "I" rule so much more! (3.50 / 2) (#14)
by guppie on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 07:28:45 AM EST

Just compare "I" and Thad ;-)

Wow, this thing is really silly, but it works fine for extending my already way too long sufing session. (Must code, not surf!)

What? The land of the free? Whoever told you that is your enemy.
-Zack de la Rocha
[ Parent ]

this sucks! (3.75 / 4) (#7)
by dave114 on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 05:25:23 AM EST

so slashdot.org rules and kuro5hin sucks?
That's news to me...

Rusty vs. Inoshiro (4.00 / 3) (#8)
by Seumas on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 06:08:11 AM EST

Rusty: 25/150
Inoshiro: 0/1

I'm sorry, but it had to be done.
I just read K5 for the articles.
How about a localized version? (4.50 / 4) (#9)
by Seumas on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 06:12:12 AM EST

It would be cool to see another field on that page where you could do the rules/sucks test, but limit the queries and results to those found within the K5 database itself. It would be interesting to see if the K5 population tends to match the rest of the online world in sucks/rules values.
I just read K5 for the articles.
Bodily Fluids (2.60 / 5) (#11)
by Seumas on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 07:09:29 AM EST

I am so going to get hammered for this, but this was posted in the MLP section and I'm quite certain this is proper use of the Sucks-Rules-O-Meter:

Favorite Bodily Fluids (least favorite to favorite):

  • menstruation* [11:2]
  • urine [10:3]
  • feces [3:3]
  • sperm [6:7]
  • blood [94:451]
[*] menses was the actual original search tearm, but yielded no results, so the more likely used term 'menstruation' was substituted. This may slightly skew the comparisons as references to menstruation may infer feelings about the act or process itself and not merely the menses (fluid) involved.
I just read K5 for the articles.
It's official! (4.00 / 2) (#12)
by YesNoCancel on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 07:12:28 AM EST

I knew soccer would rule more than american football. Ha!

The age old question... (5.00 / 1) (#13)
by Seumas on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 07:22:23 AM EST

Well, I found the answer to the age-old question in the battle of the sexes... I'd say that whips the soccer versus football importance! ;)

Who ruls? Men/Women.
I just read K5 for the articles.
[ Parent ]

Hardly fair :) (3.00 / 1) (#23)
by spiralx on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 09:14:04 AM EST

This is the internet after all - this comparison is obviously going to be weighted by the vast number of pornographics websites that contain the words "women" and "sucks" in them... ;)

You're doomed, I'm doomed, we're all doomed for ice cream. - Bob Aboey
[ Parent ]

Ah hah! You've proved my point!!! (none / 0) (#24)
by Seumas on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 09:50:50 AM EST

Yes, you just proved my point! There is even photographic evidence, as you pointed out, to show it! *grin*
I just read K5 for the articles.
[ Parent ]
Don't tell Gandalf Greyhame (4.00 / 2) (#15)
by itsbruce on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 08:01:15 AM EST

It wouldn't be kind.


It is impolite to tell a man who is carrying you on his shoulders that his head smells.
Another suggested one (4.00 / 3) (#16)
by imperium on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 08:15:56 AM EST

a friend tried monarch, vacuum cleaner.

Give it a go. It does exactly what you'd expect!


Along those same lines. (none / 0) (#20)
by Seumas on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 09:00:01 AM EST

It's final! Call Kenneth Starr!

Monica Lewinksy unreputedly sucks!
I just read K5 for the articles.
[ Parent ]

But... (3.00 / 1) (#26)
by rusty on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 11:29:28 AM EST

Bill Clinton sucks more.

Not the real rusty
[ Parent ]
Wow (4.00 / 2) (#19)
by BehTong on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 08:56:28 AM EST

K5 sucks (11 to 3) whereas Kuro5hin is neither (0 to 0). But Slashdot rules (2 to 1)? Hmm.

Maybe K5's 11 to 3 ratio is due to the recent wave of "k5 is dying" rants? :-)

Beh Tong Kah Beh Si!

k5 vs k5 (none / 0) (#30)
by wiredog on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 12:14:16 PM EST

Try this.

The idea of a global village is wrong, it's more like a gazillion pub bars.
[ Parent ]

Bug! (4.00 / 2) (#21)
by molo on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 09:02:46 AM EST

short words and punctuation get barfed on

but overall, this is pretty damn cool. Thanks, rusty. :)

Whenever you walk by a computer and see someone using pico, be kind. Pause for a second and remind yourself that: "There, but for the grace of God, go I." -- Harley Hahn

okay, this is disturbing (5.00 / 1) (#27)
by Field Marshall Stack on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 11:32:51 AM EST

Try "slashdot, hitler"
Ben Allen, hiway@speakeasy.org
"Nobody ever lends money to a man with a sense of humor"
-Peter Tork
Pro wrestling results (3.66 / 3) (#28)
by antizeus on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 12:12:52 PM EST

Since k5 is partly about "culture", and there is no higher form of culture than professional wrestling, I decided to run some objective tests on the matter.
  • Even though he's got a big following on the internet for his great technical wrestling skills, Chris Benoit just barely rules. That's somewhat surprising.
  • Even worse, Dean Malenko sucks, despite being another excellent technician. Then again he's a small man in a big man's federation.
  • Similarly, Lance Storm apparently sucks despite his outstanding ring work and his current gimmick, in which he says (rightly) that Canada rules.
  • Olympic hero and WWF champion Kurt Angle rules. It's true, it's true.
  • Kurt's title reign is in for a challenge, as Stone Cold Steve Austin, who will have a title shot at the upcoming Wrestlemania event, also rules.
  • Unfortunately, current WCW champion Scott Steiner sucks. Perhaps that means that he'll lose the belt at the next pay-per-view.
  • On the other hand, Steiner's presumed opponent "Big Lazy" Kevin Nash sucks as well.
  • Apparently it's a good thing that Goldberg was "fired", because he sucks too.
  • As one might expect, Hulk Hogan sucks.
  • Finally, Vince McMahon rules, while Vince Russo sucks. No wonder the WWF has been beating WCW lately. However, now that Eric Bischoff (who rules) is in charge of WCW, things will probably turn around. Paul Heyman of ECW sucks, which probably explains why ECW is in danger of dying right now.

Excellent! (none / 0) (#32)
by ajschu on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 01:37:26 PM EST

I tried to run a few more, but I kept getting results of 0:0... what gives?

I want to know if Edge & Christian really do rule.


[ Parent ]
hotlist thingie? (5.00 / 1) (#29)
by ana on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 12:13:31 PM EST

Yo dudes,

Could you put one of those little circle-plus-sign thingies on the sucks-rules-o-meter, so I can put it in my Hotlist?

Seriously cool...


Years go by; will I still be waiting
for somebody else to understand?
--Tori Amos

Vicious cycle (5.00 / 2) (#31)
by Erf on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 12:45:27 PM EST

You know, the more these results get reported, and the more Google reads the reports, the more those results will be reinforced. Which means that, if this takes off, anything which sucks will have a hard time making a comeback, and anything that rules will be nigh impossible to dethrone...

...doin' the things a particle can...

It's Broken -- Fix it! (5.00 / 1) (#33)
by greyrat on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 01:49:30 PM EST

Which is, of course why K5 Sucks...well hmmmm. I guess it neither sucks or rules!

"It is our belief, however, that serious professional users will run out of things they can do with UNIX. They'll want a real system and will end up doing VMS when they get to be serious about programming." -- Ken Olsen, CEO of DEC, 1984

~ ~ ~
Did I actually read the article? No. No I didn't.
"Watch out for me nobbystyles, Gromit!"

Problems? (5.00 / 1) (#34)
by butchhoward on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 03:02:29 PM EST

I get zeros as results for everything I try

Okay, so I'm not getting paranoid... (none / 0) (#35)
by mauftarkie on Thu Feb 01, 2001 at 05:33:22 PM EST

I thought maybe the K5 Cabal was out to get me when all my responses were 0 as well.

Without you I'm one step closer to happiness without violence.
Without you I'm one step closer to innocence without consequence.

[ Parent ]
rude! (none / 0) (#36)
by imperium on Fri Feb 02, 2001 at 04:01:29 PM EST

I can't believe they took it down: surely it's harmless fun?

pah! and I liked google too..


K5 Unveils Interactive Sucks-Rules-O-Meter | 36 comments (33 topical, 3 editorial, 0 hidden)
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