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Ultra-Extreme Programming

By SlydeRule in MLP
Thu Aug 02, 2001 at 02:30:46 AM EST
Tags: Humour (all tags)

Extreme Programming (XP) not extreme enough for you?

Check out Reactive Programming (RiP).

This new process removes virtually all of those pesky procedural roadblocks that reduce programmer productivity. For example:
You can't possibly know the scope until the project is finished. Therefore, there's rarely any point even speaking to the customer until right at the very end.


Voxel dot net
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Favorite Software Process
o RUP 1%
o XP 10%
o RiP 6%
o Waterfall 1%
o Spiral 7%
o Cluster 4%
o Just Lemme Do My Job 41%
o I'm Busy, Give It To Inoshiro 26%

Votes: 65
Results | Other Polls

Related Links
o Reactive Programming (RiP)
o Also by SlydeRule

Display: Sort:
Ultra-Extreme Programming | 10 comments (10 topical, editorial, 0 hidden)
Reminds me of something... (3.00 / 1) (#1)
by roiem on Wed Aug 01, 2001 at 12:16:11 PM EST

This sounds disturbingly like my company...
90% of all projects out there are basically glorified interfaces to relational databases.
this is my company. (none / 0) (#6)
by provider on Thu Aug 02, 2001 at 03:50:07 AM EST

[ Parent ]
So? (3.00 / 1) (#2)
by egerlach on Wed Aug 01, 2001 at 12:45:36 PM EST

Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt, bought the farm.

"Free beer tends to lead to free speech"
Cool (4.00 / 2) (#3)
by MSBob on Wed Aug 01, 2001 at 01:14:56 PM EST

After all my company are early adopters. Now that I know what was being adopted...
I don't mind paying taxes, they buy me civilization.

Disturbing mental imagery (4.25 / 4) (#5)
by Signal 11 on Wed Aug 01, 2001 at 02:15:46 PM EST

I just imagined a bunch of hackers wearing "EMACS is DEATH" t-shirts snowboarding down the side of a steep slope with IBM keyboards retrofitted for snowboard use... with the caption underneath "Ultra Xtreme Programming: The New Thing"...

I blame not having my morning caffeine...

Society needs therapy. It's having
trouble accepting itself.

re: disturbing mental imagery (none / 0) (#7)
by jbridge21 on Thu Aug 02, 2001 at 11:58:35 AM EST

Sheesh! Talk about pressure to perform! I'm not sure anybody could multitask that well.

[ Parent ]
Familiar stuff.... (none / 0) (#8)
by WWWWolf on Thu Aug 02, 2001 at 12:29:20 PM EST

...most of the stuff I did earlier myself were done with this sort of methodology. Needless to say, I was rather amazed to notice that planning what to do in advance made things a lot easier. =)

Speaking of Extreme Programming, I got myself a PalmGlove ("sporty" neoprene cover for Palm organizer) in case someone in the company decides that XP is the way to go. Let's just dive to the bottom of the sea to code, then... =)

-- Weyfour WWWWolf, a lupine technomancer from the cold north...

Big Ball of mud (none / 0) (#9)
by guinsu on Thu Aug 02, 2001 at 03:04:36 PM EST

This really reminds me of the Big Ball of Mud coding methodology.

You want Extreme? (none / 0) (#10)
by Elkor on Thu Aug 02, 2001 at 03:10:15 PM EST

How about Iron Man Programming?

When your computer crashes, you throw it out the window.

When the checker finds a "bug" he releases a spider/cockroach/other into your office/computer/home/lunch without your knowledge.

Every time a user gets an "error code" from your program you pay them a cash amount equal to the error code (i.e. Error code 58 is worth $58) AND throw THEIR computer out the window.

No registry entries.

No DLLS allowed.

The program exists in one executable. No easy to replace .cab or .lib files.


"I won't tell you how to love God if you don't tell me how to love myself."
-Margo Eve
Alternate Iron Man (4.00 / 1) (#11)
by Elendale on Sun Aug 05, 2001 at 05:06:42 PM EST

Every time the program crashes, your code goes with it.
Warning: Do not try this with large programs, group projects, or on a Windows system!


When free speech is outlawed, only criminals will complain.

[ Parent ]
Ultra-Extreme Programming | 10 comments (10 topical, 0 editorial, 0 hidden)
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