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Demons are able to possess anything with a brain, from
a chicken to a human being.
Damn! I thought we were finally going to have the explanation for /. trolling, once and for all. Guess not. [sorry fluffy ;-)]
And today's thinking
machines have enough space on their hard drives to
accommodate Satan or his pals.
[Church Lady voice]: "Hmmmm.... /usr/etc/SATAN!!!!"
The minister said he probed one such case
logging onto the parishioner's computer himself. To his
surprise, an artificial-intelligence program fired up --
without him clicking it on. "The program began talking
directly to me, openly mocked me," he recalls. "It typed
out, 'Preacher, you are a weakling and your God is a
damn liar.' "
Well, we've warned you all about Emacs before. But noooo. You didn't listen!
"I later had an expert in dead languages examine the
text," the minister said. "It turned out to be...
Visual Basic! [rimshot]
The minister estimates that one in 10 computers in
America now houses some type of evil spirit.
I thought it was like 90%? Man, linux must be taking over the desktops faster than ever!
Rev. Peasboro advises that if you suspect your
computer is possessed, you consult a clergyman or, if
the computer is still under warranty, take it in for
servicing. He says, "Technicians can replace the hard
drive and reinstall the software, getting rid of the wicked
"Microsoft tech support, how can I help you?"
"My computer is possessed by demons."
"Have you tried rebooting your machine sir?"
Ok, I know I just basically copied in the entire article, but my god, that was funny. Thanks you fluffy, for absolutely making my day. :-)
Not the real rusty