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Missile-Grade Ore

By LilDebbie in News
Thu Jul 04, 2013 at 09:59:51 AM EST
Tags: (all tags)

or

How I Stopped Worrying And Learned To Ignore Everything Reuters Has To Say


EXCLUSIVE! Reuters, by way of Maytaal Angel and Jonathan Saul, who both coincidentally happen to be Jewish, informs us those dastardly Persians are at it again by fiendishly importing missile-grade ore from ze Germans. What in unholy fuck is missile-grade ore? Maytaal and Saul are on the ball:
Alumina is a refined version of the raw ore bauxite. It is typically used to make aluminum, but in its high purity or 'chemical grade' form, it has non-metal applications that have sensitive military uses.
For those of you interested in crazy shit like IUPAC nomenclature, alumina is aluminium oxide also known as Al2O3 also also known as the second most common element comprising the Earth's crust and the can in a fucking can of Coca-Cola™. That dirty motherfucker you see digging through the trash? He's not looking for scrap to recycle into cheap liquor. He's looking for terrorism.

Thankfully, Dear Leader's advisor Mark Dubowitz, who coincidentally happens to be Jewish, assures us, "new sanctions will blacklist metals trade with Iran including aluminum, coal, steel, gold, silver and platinum amongst others, and should include alumina."

God help us should the Iranians ever discover ze Germans' advanced technology that they might extract this fearsome metal from 15.9% of the fucking dirt beneath their feet. The gold missiles were bad enough!

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Display: Sort:
Missile-Grade Ore | 13 comments (11 topical, 2 editorial, 0 hidden)
And anyway (none / 1) (#2)
by Nimey on Tue Jul 02, 2013 at 08:38:36 PM EST

what they're not saying is that the aluminum they're worried about is used in centrifuges.  No sense selling the Iranians that stuff.

But please, continue with your hysterical vaginal bleeding; it's most entertaining.
--
Never mind, it was just the dog cumming -- jandev
You Sir, are an Ignorant Motherfucker. -- Crawford
I am arguably too manic to do that. -- Crawford
I already fuck my mother -- trane
Nimey is right -- Blastard
i am in complete agreement with Nimey -- i am a pretty big deal

(3) congrats on 10k comments! (none / 1) (#4)
by LilDebbie on Tue Jul 02, 2013 at 09:51:06 PM EST

^_^

My name is LilDebbie and I have a garden.
- hugin -

[ Parent ]
ror (none / 0) (#5)
by Nimey on Tue Jul 02, 2013 at 10:32:47 PM EST


--
Never mind, it was just the dog cumming -- jandev
You Sir, are an Ignorant Motherfucker. -- Crawford
I am arguably too manic to do that. -- Crawford
I already fuck my mother -- trane
Nimey is right -- Blastard
i am in complete agreement with Nimey -- i am a pretty big deal

[ Parent ]
THEY'LL BE WANTING SILICA NEXT (3.00 / 3) (#3)
by BottleRocket on Tue Jul 02, 2013 at 09:20:49 PM EST


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$ . . . . .
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Yes I do download [child pornography], but I don't keep it any longer than I need to, so it can yield insight as to how to find more. --MDC
$ . . . . .
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . $
. . . . * . . . . . * . . . . . * . . . . . * . . . . . *
. ₩ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
$ . . . . . $ . . . . . $ . . . . . $
$B R Σ III$

Nyah (none / 0) (#9)
by Enlarged to Show Texture on Wed Jul 03, 2013 at 01:38:08 PM EST

They aren't mother frackers...


"Those people who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do." -- Isaac Asimov
[ Parent ]
Sounds Legit. (none / 1) (#6)
by greengrass on Tue Jul 02, 2013 at 10:50:33 PM EST



Brown people can't be trusted with atoms. (3.00 / 2) (#7)
by Wise Cracker on Wed Jul 03, 2013 at 01:07:05 AM EST

Or photons.

Seriously, though, I thought that whole aluminum tube thing was played out.
--
Caesars come, and Caesars go, but Newton lives forever

The Empire $ (none / 1) (#8)
by Enlarged to Show Texture on Wed Jul 03, 2013 at 10:00:24 AM EST




"Those people who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do." -- Isaac Asimov
BTW did you happen to know what a CRT is? (none / 1) (#11)
by Riddick on Thu Jul 04, 2013 at 02:19:06 AM EST

A CRT or cathode ray tube is a very small particle accelorator. It is used in old TV sets that used a "tube" and older computer monitors.

The projection TV sets used a larger and higher powered one. I remember my brother-in-law trying to get rid of his old malfunctioning projection TV set and tearing it apart with a hammer and crowbar to make it fit in a dumpster. They had three cathod ray devices one green, one blue, and one red. Eacn one had 'warning radiation hazard' on them and the only protection the TV viewer had was this wooden posterboard material and no metals or lead at all.

It is said that using these CRTs in a way with an aluminim scoop as a cyclotron you can turn some basic metals and materials into a weapons grade material for use in a dirty bomb or possible turn it into something in the lanthaium series, which could make an atomic bomb or something.

It is said that the Manhattan Project was low buget like $500 Milion or something to refine the urianium or plutinium or whatever they had into weapons grade, and that at that time the tech was ahead of its time, but it is used in ordandary stuff and 1970's technology and can easily be converted.

That the real reason to go to digital TV sets was to get rid of all of the CRTs that could have been used to make weaponized materials. LCD and Plasma screens work on a different principle.

I'd imagine someone of Crawford's genuis would take a CRT and turn it into a man portable particle accelorator gun and start zapping some terrorists or something.

FP. Does not enable fags $ (3.00 / 2) (#13)
by zombie Fred Phelps on Thu Jul 04, 2013 at 09:59:39 AM EST



o rly? (none / 1) (#14)
by LilDebbie on Thu Jul 04, 2013 at 01:21:11 PM EST

ya rly

My name is LilDebbie and I have a garden.
- hugin -

[ Parent ]
Missile-Grade Ore | 13 comments (11 topical, 2 editorial, 0 hidden)
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