Part of the problem is that these are "shoulds". Should, at least for me, has a very parental, arrogant, authoratarian tone to it. "You should be taking out the trash! You should be doing your homework, not listening to that... noise!"
I can't speak for anyone else, but if I spent New Years Eve/Day telling myself that kind of crap - essentially verbally beating myself to death - wild horses couldn't drag me into doing any of it. Of course I'd resent it!
And THAT, I believe, is the key to why such resolutions fail. We resent them. We resent the smug, know-it-all attitude that often lies behind such "resolutions".
Substituting "should" with "try" is even worse. "I'll try to do XYZ better" really means "I don't give a shit, but I think someone else might, so I've got to make it look like I'm making an effort."
This year, if you want Yet Another Alternative Suggestion, try this. Give yourself a break! Don't set yourself up for failure. You do NOT need to start the new year feeling miserable, resentful, angry, and/or a failure. Too many people do just that, which is why they spend the rest of the year making everyone else miserable, to make up for it.
If you need to set a goal, then set this one: I'll do the best I can at balancing my own needs with my own wants, with others needs, and with others wants.
This is something you almost can't fail to achieve, as it's what you're already doing, automatically, every day. The only purpose in having such a resolution is to start thinking about what you are doing, so you can fine-tune it, if, when and where you choose to.
ANY other resolution you can make that you CAN succeed at doing MUST follow from this one. The only question is where you've set the balance. That is all. In fact, not only will every resolution that you can succeed at follow from it, but so will everything you DO succeed at! Again, the only question is where you've set the balance.
So, that's something you've got to add. State where you are comfortable having that balance, between all four variables. Not as absolutes, because you're going to have different balances at work, at home, or out shopping, or whatever. But just some general abstract notion of where you're setting your limits.
Once you do that, the resolutions you might have otherwise written have a much better chance of actually happening, because you're not being set up to fail. And you might actually HAVE a "happy new year", for a change!