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Everything I need to know about Illegal Immigration I learned from Eight Legged Freaks

By xC0000005 in Op-Ed
Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 05:31:48 PM EST
Tags: (all tags)

I saw it when I popped the lid of the supers - I couldn't have missed it, being nearly the size of my palm. A common orb spider, hiding in these old unused honey supers. It and about eighty more of its kind have built webs all around my equipment. I spent the most of a week fighting them. Now I see that there are some important lessons to be learned.


The common orb spider is a fascinating beast, eight legs, eight eyes, covered in bristles. It's no wonder people get the creeps around them. They move with a grace and speed, seizing their prey and encasing it for a slow, painful death by dissolution. I hate the little buggers - they make my skin crawl.

I began by dumping them out. I deported the spiders to the bushes near my shed, soon creating a crawling cluster of spiders, some of whom happily devoured their weaker sisters. Once I found the first three I went on a raid, clearing every spider I could find from my shed. It was a lot of spiders, more than I had noticed before. My guess is that they've always been there, I just turned a blind eye to them.

The next day they were back. The little buggers had crawled back into my boxes, respun their webs, and even caught a few meals. Under cover of darkness they had left the bushes which are their natural home and returned. So I took them out again, further. This time I left them on a single tree about twenty yards from the shed. It looked like a scene from Arachnophobia, with all the orb spiders crawling around. Things were fine until Thursday.

Thursday they were back. I squished two to send a message. Then, as I watched a couple of yellow jackets flew into the shed. They crawled into the honey supers and began to search for something sweet. It is the time of the year when Yellow jackets trade their mildly insane aggressive behavior for full scientology crazy aggressive behavior. And then I noticed that one was caught in an orb spider's web. Most spiders don't mess with wasps. Wasps are fairly high on the predator chain in the insect world and your average spider isn't quite strong/crazy/dumb enough to risk a confrontation with something that wounds with one end and kills with another. Not the orb spiders.

The orb spiders would clip the webs so that the wasps had slack and let them struggle. Once the wasp tired the spider would dart in, setting off a new frenzy from the wasp and triggering a hasty retreat by the spider. The spider never left though. They'd start repairing their web, circling the wasp, waiting. The wasps would tire. The spiders were patient. And it was then that I realized that these spiders had something to offer me. Much like the guy who works on the concrete, or the woman who cleans the hospital sheets, these eight legged freaks had something to offer. So I decided to test immigration theory on my arachnid squatters.

Stage One: I threw open the shed, shouting Immigracion! The spiders ignored me. I rounded them up, put them on shoe boxes, and deported them to the bushes where they lived before the shed was there. The boxes were clear, I was able to go through my equipment without being afraid of a necrosis inducing bite, and I spent a lot of time killing wasps. The next day they were back. Because I was committed to the cause, I deported them again, this time on an air flight, throwing the box back into the bushes. The spiders continued to return.

Stage Two: I decided to institute a "Guest Predator" program. I gathered up the spiders and lectured them while my wife tried to decide if I was hallucinating or if she should lock the doors while I was outside. I explained to my fine orb spinning guests that they were welcome, even necessary in my shed, and all I asked was that they return to their point of origin, pay a small fine (in dead wasps) and be certified to return. That evening I sat in a lawn chair by the bushes and waited, flashlight and marking paint in hand. I waited, I waited. Total number of spiders entered by the "Guest Predator" program? One. And I'm pretty certain he was actually at the bushes already. The spiders in the shed built their webs, ate their wasps, and generally ignored my good will attempts to assimilate them.

Stage Three: This time I deported all the spiders to the bushes, and set up my son's train track to serve as a fence. That night, under cover of darkness, I observed the orb spiders crossing the garden, crawling down the timbers, and coming to my fence. And not one stopped. Not a single spider honored the borders of my country, they all crossed illegally. Taking a page from the minute men, I took a bull horn and shouted at the spiders while shining lights at them. "Go back!" I yelled. The ones I shined the light at turned back, afraid. There was one of me and dozens of them though, so while I kept one or two on their side, most simply slipped by un noticed and set up again their beautiful wasp killing orbs. I set up Optimus prime near the bushes and offered to transport spiders across the border for a few dozen flies but the spiders weren't interested.

The spiders were not at all deterred from crossing my borders. No amount of deporting them, yelling, jack-lighting, or fencing them would keep them from coming back to the shed. The reason? The shed is opportunity. The next day I let the spiders be, and they killed a goodly number of wasps, as well as a few foolish bees. The bees will be fine - there's 60,000 more of them. As I finished up working on the honey frames I noticed that each of the spiders was carrying with it an egg sack. They returned to the shed despite the risk of getting squished because the shed represents their best opportunity to provide for their family. Well, for their eggs.

Now I don't like the spiders. They are hairy, and ugly, and they don't speak English. They reproduce without birth control as often as possible, and they completely disregard my sovereignty and law making ability. And it turns out I need them. They aren't looking to take over my place as beekeeper. Then again, they aren't learning English as best I can tell, and I'm dreading needing to post signs in spider and English, but the general points still apply:

Illegal aliens are not spiders, but they are driven by similar forces. It's the desire to eat that drives the spiders, and the aliens risking transport in shipping containers and box cars are no different. My laws, my fences, my "kind offers" - they mean nothing to the spiders, and neither do our rules to illegal aliens. For the sake of feeding their family (and some come from extended family cultures that rival the spiders) they will disregard all danger. Guest workers programs would require returning to a point where they can't feed their families, and paying a fine they don't have the money for. More than anything, our economy is dependent on their cheap labor to get our fruit to the table, our roads built, our bridges under-maintained.

I've decided to take the spiders up on their generous offer. They can continue to live in the shed. I'm taxing them two wasp heads a weak and best of all I've managed to stop wasting my time fighting a battle that cannot be won. What if we carded illegals? Ran them through the documentation system and let them stay, let their employers pick up the fines? If illegals are a drain on our resources, why not force them into the system and let them start contributing rather than deporting them to a place they'll never stay?

The spiders are starting to grow on me, I admit. I leave them alone, they mostly leave me alone, and the wasps get the bad end of the deal.

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Everything I need to know about Illegal Immigration I learned from Eight Legged Freaks | 70 comments (58 topical, 12 editorial, 3 hidden)
You are guilty of anthropomorphism. (1.80 / 5) (#1)
by LilDebbie Lover on Wed Aug 22, 2007 at 10:05:00 PM EST

I reject your argument and your implied position on the subject.  If illegal immigrants want to cross the border onto our property, then they should be shot and killed.  I assure you, once you start executing those that illegally cross the border, the lot of them will stop.  Unlike your spiders, people can (apparently) process such information.

Signature of Disutility:
* Jedi Warrior Betrayal
* Emo Jedi Warrior Betrayal
* Betrayal of Aalya Secura
* Death of Spartan 117
* Enslavement of Man
* Humanity's Destruction
* Rise of the Horde

Also:
* "ALL I REQUIRE IS A PURPLE MARKER" ~LilDebbie
* "I'm straight but I like having sex with men" ~xC0000005
Nah, we could give the minutemen toe tags (none / 0) (#2)
by xC0000005 on Wed Aug 22, 2007 at 10:23:14 PM EST

open season and free ammo and it wouldn't slow the tide. All of Mexico, Central America, and South America is not a dung heap. Some of it is and you aren't going to prevent the desparate from trying. I saw we put them into the tax grinder.

Voice of the Hive - Beekeeping and Bees for those who don't
[ Parent ]
READ BELOW FOR INSTRUCTIONS TO MAKE ME WORK BETTER (1.33 / 3) (#47)
by raduga on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 02:25:10 PM EST

typos make little baby nyarlathotep cry :(

"desparate" -> "desperate"
"saw" -> "say"

I imagine you could have meant "disparate" in the first reference,
but the immutable laws of probability regard it unlikely.

[ Parent ]

Linking to k5 in your post is so corny... (none / 1) (#15)
by bob6 on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 03:38:52 AM EST

How do you expect to make a point?

Cheers.
[ Parent ]
On top of that... (none / 1) (#16)
by bob6 on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 05:21:16 AM EST

you're a touchy lover.

Cheers.
[ Parent ]
+1 FP Anthropomorphic Spiders (none / 0) (#52)
by Phssthpok on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 05:32:08 PM EST


____________

affective flattening has caused me to kill 11,357 people

[ Parent ]
This would only work (none / 0) (#53)
by tthomas48 on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 06:10:38 PM EST

If you owned all the property along the border. Which I doubt you do. So it won't work.

[ Parent ]
Kill them with Fire (2.16 / 6) (#3)
by givemegmail111 on Wed Aug 22, 2007 at 10:39:07 PM EST

And get some insecticide to kill the spiders.

--
McDonalds: i'm lovin' it
Start your day tastefully with a Sausage, Egg & Cheese McGriddle, only at McDonalds.
Rusty fix my sig, dammit!
voting up by the implicit racism (2.71 / 7) (#7)
by lonelyhobo on Wed Aug 22, 2007 at 11:25:09 PM EST

of comparing mexicans to a bug infestation

Bugs are Bugs, People are People (none / 0) (#9)
by xC0000005 on Wed Aug 22, 2007 at 11:33:48 PM EST

but some basic conclusions on what drives each are quite possible.

Voice of the Hive - Beekeeping and Bees for those who don't
[ Parent ]
since i have you here (3.00 / 3) (#12)
by lonelyhobo on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 12:16:39 AM EST

What are the yellow jackets in your metaphor?  The irish?  maybe the chinese?

[ Parent ]
PROBABLY BLACK PEOPLE (3.00 / 4) (#13)
by INDUBITABLY on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 01:10:12 AM EST


BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND
[ Parent ]

I think the bees are supposed to represent (3.00 / 4) (#45)
by Booger on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 12:13:37 PM EST

the WASPs.  Oh, wait...

-
I did think of a derogatory term for white people--RICH. Call some white guy RICH and it doesn't matter how much money they have, they'll start squealin about how oh they wish they were rich.--tdillo
[ Parent ]

Finely-ground reference! (none / 0) (#63)
by Rudd-O on Fri Aug 24, 2007 at 07:26:46 AM EST

At first I didn't notice, but WASPs perfectly fit the wasp reference in the story.  It made me crack up!

[ Parent ]
i went to antigua once (2.55 / 9) (#10)
by circletimessquare on Wed Aug 22, 2007 at 11:39:18 PM EST

and i witnessed a prety funny exchange on antiguan television

it's a very small country, so every once in awhile the prime minister gets on tv and lectures everyone like a father lecturing a bunch of kids. it's patronizing and emotional, which actually makes it so endearing and refresing, because it's so direct... such a thing is impossible in any larger countries would be impossible: the politics is all cold, distant, corporate, and emotionaless, by necessity of the sheer size of the country

the prime minister was responding to antiguans complaining about jamaicans coming and stealing all of their jobs. jamaica is a flyspeck country itself, but compared to antigua (about 75,000) jamaica is a behemoth (3 million)

i just loved this testy impatient way the prime minister slowly and deliberately, explained the situation, in a belittling and purposefully patronizing manner, almost as if he were making fun of his citizens, it was hilarious. sort of like "we've been over this 200x morons, do i have to explain this shit all over again you dumb fucks?"

basically, antiguans had some jobs they weren't doing: trashmen being his example. the prime minister held up examples of newspaper ads from years before as proof: unanswered want ads

so antigua used some jamaicans to do these jobs antiguans didn't want to do. and now he antiguans were complaining that the jamaicans were stealing their jobs

this little lesson taught me a lot about american antipathy to mexican immigrants. basically americans are shortsighted, self-serving and blind to their own folly, just like the antiguans

they want the mexicans to go home. ok. and they also want certain jobs done that no one else will do, and done cheaply. ok

make up your mind you fucking americans. you can have one or the other: no mexicans, or jobs done you won't do. you can't have both you dim shortsighted morons


The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

fair analogy but wrong conclusion (3.00 / 3) (#32)
by Liar on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 10:44:59 AM EST

We always hear that immigrants will do jobs that no American wants to do, but that's an incomplete phrase. They do jobs that no American wants to do at that wage. Pay those positions more and they will likely be filled.

I remember at the height of the dot-Com boom there was a website dedicated to listing outrageous want ads: "Wanted: java programmer with 12 years experience, $8/hour." That position probably went unfilled and it deserved to go unfilled.

Granted, such a person who qualified had expertise and could command more but that was due to his position relative to the market than the time he spent in study: the labor pool was small enough that there were more competitive offers he could accept. It's interesting that we professionals want a tight labor market for our own industries but when it comes to manual labor, screw the bastards, pay them less than minimum wage.

Get a handle on immigration and issues such as minimum wage would become useless relics of the past because people would pay what jobs are actually worth.


I admit I'm a Liar. That's why you can trust me.
[ Parent ]
you're a fucking moron (2.33 / 3) (#36)
by circletimessquare on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 11:00:16 AM EST

"dishwashers wanted, $30 an hour"

wonderful, now you just shut down 80 percent of the diners in the us, because no one can afford to eat there

or here's another tack: farm workers. pay them a high salary to attract american workers. now when you go to a us supermarket, your watermelons, advocados, broccoli, etc are now $20, when they used to be $2 (to pay for americans to pick crops)

so nobody buys them. what do they buy instead? they buy strawberries, beans, etc. from latin american countries where the workers get paid even LESS than the illegal immigrants in the usa!

oh ok: so now you pass a law: no foreign fruits and vegetables

wonderful

  1. the american consumer hates you. the americans are eating less healthy foods, getting fatter and sicker and even more diabetic, because they can't afford fruits and vegetables
  2. furthermore, the latin american countries you have just denied a market are complaining to you that they have to put people out of work because they can't sell those crops to the us

so you tell guetamala they just need to pay their farm workers $20 an hour. laughter or stony silence ensues, since the guatemalan ambassador wonders what kind of fucktard doesn't understand what "poor country" means. furthermore, those guetamalan farm workers your no imports policy put of a job in their home country: GEE I WONDER WHERE THEY WANT TO GO TO NOW TO WASH DISHES??!!

you're a fucking moron

you don't understand the fucking problem


The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

[ Parent ]

you don't get it, do you? (2.00 / 2) (#46)
by Liar on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 02:08:25 PM EST

The market can absorb such prices. In fact, what you would find is that it would have an equalizing affect on incomes across all work categories. So, the CEO's would make less and the farm workers would make more. Forgive me for being more sympathetic for those making minimum wage than those earning more than the national average.

Mind you, income for many would go down a little bit, but in return those currently making less than the national average would have more income at their disposal and would be more apt to spend it. Liquidity improves, prices become less volatile, the economy will have fewer barriers to growth. In addition, increasing the wealth at the lower end entails improved education and health while lowering crime.

And you don't even have to legislate more taxes to get it.

Alternatively, look at it this way: do you really want to base your economy on an endless supply of cheap labor? What will you do when even those labor pools dry up, where will you get your cheap labor then? Better instead to build your economy on solid economic fundamentals than to exploit the disparity between rich nation and poor nation--and make no mistake those other nations are getting richer. Within 100 years there won't be any significant disparity at all between Mexico and the U.S.

But, knowing your shortsightedness, you only see the one side of the equation not considering its larger effects on the economy as a whole.


I admit I'm a Liar. That's why you can trust me.
[ Parent ]
uhhhh (3.00 / 2) (#50)
by circletimessquare on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 03:55:51 PM EST

i just saw a bunch of positive statements comprising a list of wish fulfillment items

and absolutely no statements concerning economic forces, nevermind actually understanding economics

now i know why people protest the imf, the g8 and nafta: in the same way the pap you wrote above you think is actually supposed to make a difference in this world, those protesters think their protests are actually going to change the cold hard realities of simple economics

i think the world should be made of cotton candy

poof*

look at that! it is so!

pffffffffft


The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

[ Parent ]

If the market could absorb it now... (3.00 / 2) (#65)
by phrits on Fri Aug 24, 2007 at 11:01:33 AM EST

...then it can absorb it later, and taking advantage of plentiful, cheap resources while they're stil plentiful and cheap is simply making good use of opportunity.

That said, I'd love to have your optimism about CEO salaries coming down as lower income wages go up, but I think you're nuts. The upper class is shrinking even as it controls more of the national wealth, and that trend just isn't going to change any time soon no matter what we do on immigration. We may look just like Mexico in 100 years, but it's not because Jose and friends are mowing our lawns today.



[ Parent ]
that's too much common sense (none / 1) (#67)
by circletimessquare on Fri Aug 24, 2007 at 11:40:44 AM EST

wasted on a fuckload of ignorant idealism that you are responding to


The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

[ Parent ]
A county of 75,000 needs a Prime minister? (none / 0) (#42)
by Booger on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 11:30:20 AM EST

That's like k5 having its own congressman.

-

I did think of a derogatory term for white people--RICH. Call some white guy RICH and it doesn't matter how much money they have, they'll start squealin about how oh they wish they were rich.--tdillo
[ Parent ]

k5 has it's own town drunk (3.00 / 6) (#43)
by circletimessquare on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 11:42:59 AM EST

but there are two problems with that:

  1. that title is shared by a majority of people here
  2. there is no one here who ranks higher than that


The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

[ Parent ]
Dupe [nt] (none / 1) (#62)
by thefirelane on Fri Aug 24, 2007 at 06:26:18 AM EST



-
Prube.com: Like K5, but with less point.
[ Parent ]
very true but (none / 0) (#66)
by circletimessquare on Fri Aug 24, 2007 at 11:39:03 AM EST

obscure

in other words, knowledge of my posts to such a degree as you have just shown should be a source of painful embarassment to you


The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.

[ Parent ]

SUBJECT (1.33 / 3) (#24)
by INDUBITABLY on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 07:31:31 AM EST

I THINK HOW YOU FOUGHT THE MEXICAN INFESTATION WAS FAR MORE INSTRUCTIVE.

BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND

I see you ignored Option 3 (none / 1) (#27)
by GhostOfTiber on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 08:23:28 AM EST

Let the Minutemen shoot them.

See, the flaw in the analogy here, and I think it's fairly major, is that the spiders are not bees.

[Nimey's] wife's ass is my cocksheath. - undermyne

dude (1.75 / 4) (#29)
by Redcatblack on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 09:25:19 AM EST

I would stomp the shit out of them and bomb the place. Then spray gasoline everywhere and light it up. Then salt the earth where they were.

I remember when I was living in my dad's house, my room was in the basement. I woke up one night to find wolf spiders on the bed, looking at me.

I spent the night killing all I could find, bathroom.. closet.... under the bed, in the corner of the wall. I wish I had a shovel.

Bro, that's totally rad (1.00 / 3) (#31)
by Hiphopopotamus on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 10:27:35 AM EST


_________________

I'm In LOVE!
[ Parent ]

bodacious (none / 1) (#38)
by Redcatblack on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 11:09:19 AM EST

nt

[ Parent ]
I know, dude (none / 0) (#44)
by Hiphopopotamus on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 11:48:41 AM EST


_________________

I'm In LOVE!
[ Parent ]

+1FP, actual content (2.50 / 2) (#35)
by Sgt York on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 10:50:09 AM EST

and good to boot. Also, IAWTS.

If you can't beat 'em, join tax 'em.

There is a reason for everything. Sometimes, that reason just sucks.

+1 FP (2.00 / 2) (#40)
by khallow on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 11:21:59 AM EST

Yes, we can turn every great story into a tin-hearted morality play. This so reminds me of The Day After Tomorrow when the northern hemisphere developed world gets what it deserves - execellent pretext to take over prime real estate in the equatorial regions.

Stating the obvious since 1969.

And what will you do.. (none / 1) (#49)
by system under test on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 03:27:21 PM EST

..when the spiders have overrun your shed, and your "supers", eaten all the bees, and then moved on?

Cool story.  Bad analogy.

Unless you're advocating the law of the jungle here, by comparing people to insects without higher brain function; in which case, I have plenty of ammo to live by those laws, so I'm cool with that.

What is it like, living life so paranoid? $ (none / 0) (#54)
by Scott Robinson on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 06:57:51 PM EST



[ Parent ]
When you tell me what it's like.. (none / 0) (#79)
by system under test on Wed Aug 29, 2007 at 07:49:46 PM EST

..to not be able to read the writing on the wall, I'll answer your question.

[ Parent ]
Link to an example from modern history? (none / 0) (#80)
by Scott Robinson on Mon Sep 10, 2007 at 09:51:39 PM EST

I'll even accept Wikipedia.

[ Parent ]
"Immigrant Usurper Syndrome" in 3,2,1 (none / 0) (#81)
by xC0000005 on Tue Sep 11, 2007 at 10:27:04 AM EST

The thing about wikipedia is that anyone can edit it. Even those who think pro wrestling is real. Still can edit.

Voice of the Hive - Beekeeping and Bees for those who don't
[ Parent ]
:-( Darn time delay purged the fake article. $ (none / 0) (#82)
by Scott Robinson on Wed Sep 12, 2007 at 05:17:55 AM EST



[ Parent ]
so the spiders (none / 1) (#55)
by nononoitaintmebabe on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 07:22:37 PM EST

are the mexicans, the shed is the united states, and you are julie myers?

So (none / 1) (#58)
by trhurler on Thu Aug 23, 2007 at 07:56:03 PM EST

You're saying Mexicans can't find food in Mexico and are as mindless as spiders in their behavior. I'm sure a lot of Mexicans would really appreciate your explanation that they're helpless victims of fortune and instincts and that they're too stupid to build their economy.

--
'God dammit, your posts make me hard.' --LilDebbie

Commuters in DC behave like a granular fluid (none / 0) (#64)
by lukme on Fri Aug 24, 2007 at 10:47:27 AM EST

A quote from here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crowd.

A crowd leaves the Vienna/Fairfax-GMU station on the Washington Metro on July 4, 2006. The crowd behaves like a granular fluid, and people, having the same aim, are more confined than they would normally choose to be.

I am sure they would prefer to be "mindless spiders" as opposed to a granular fluid.


-----------------------------------
It's awfully hard to fly with eagles when you're a turkey.
[ Parent ]
not really (none / 0) (#75)
by Delirium on Sun Aug 26, 2007 at 01:15:59 PM EST

A granular fluid analogy doesn't have much in the way of connotations, because granular fluids are not generally considered good or bad. Spiders, meanwhile, are frequently feared and often considered a pest, so the connotations are negative.

[ Parent ]
Yet your behavior is strangely ostrich-like: (none / 0) (#71)
by codejack on Sat Aug 25, 2007 at 02:45:13 PM EST

You stick your head in the sand to avoid seeing things that displease you, such as the U.S.'s involvement in keeping Mexico's economy stuck in the 18th century. I think the operative point here is that measures that don't work on spiders (fences, yelling, stupid bureaucratic bullshit) aren't likely to work on people.

Survival is survival, whether for spiders, ostriches, or humans; the behavior may change, but the basic motivations are, if not identical, then similar enough to carry the analogy. Widespread enlightened self-interest would fix most of our problems, but it requires widespread funding of education, which requires widespread enlightened self-interest.

We have maybe 20 years to break out of this cycle, or we all die. This article helps.


Please read before posting.

[ Parent ]
This made the front page? (none / 0) (#69)
by Social Democrat on Sat Aug 25, 2007 at 12:59:19 PM EST

I can't believe that this racist tripe made it to the front page.

------
The US is fucked up, diseased, mentally unstable & psychologically unhealthy. Its food supply is tainted, polluted, & full of chemical crap. Even worse, the US is trying to ruin the rest of the world.
Yes. (none / 0) (#70)
by xC0000005 on Sat Aug 25, 2007 at 02:18:23 PM EST

If you can do better, the queue is empty. Go for it.

Voice of the Hive - Beekeeping and Bees for those who don't
[ Parent ]
Ahem! (none / 0) (#72)
by My Momma Sewed My New Blue Jeans on Sun Aug 26, 2007 at 06:04:35 AM EST

Where does this fit into your analogy?

If she showed up in my shed (none / 0) (#76)
by xC0000005 on Sun Aug 26, 2007 at 08:30:29 PM EST

I'd grant her citizenship in return for service.

Voice of the Hive - Beekeeping and Bees for those who don't
[ Parent ]
Reform (none / 1) (#77)
by ShiftyStoner on Mon Aug 27, 2007 at 07:46:17 AM EST

Maybe they just like the trip back. Maybe you should break a few legs.

What if the spiders did want you to speak spider and put up little spider signs everywhere. What if they did learn english.

What if the spiders weren't content with staying in the shed and decided to build their numbers move into your house and fuck your wife.

Little different game then wouldn't you say.

Thing is these spiders did perfectly well without your shed. They would do fine in the bush. Maybe not as well but they would survive.

I don't have a problem with how you deal with the spiders. I like spiders. They don't want to fuck or rape your wife. They don't want your valuables. They don't want to takeover your house.

Opportunity my ass. Id bet it's mostly men crossing that border. Id bet beautiful white woman is what's on most of their minds.

The true dream of the border crossing Mexican. White pink pussy.

Sit on that.
( @ )'( @ ) The broad masses of a population are more amenable to the appeal of rhetoric than to any other force. - Adolf Hitler

excellent but a typo remains: (none / 0) (#78)
by zenofchai on Mon Aug 27, 2007 at 02:47:54 PM EST

two wasp heads a weak

:(
--
The K5 Interactive Political Compass SVG Graph

Everything I need to know about Illegal Immigration I learned from Eight Legged Freaks | 70 comments (58 topical, 12 editorial, 3 hidden)
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