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Our lunatic Military

By spacemoose in Op-Ed
Wed Nov 24, 2010 at 08:22:39 PM EST
Tags: (all tags)

Nobel peace prize winner President Obama is in portugal for a 2 day Nato summit, in which he is trying to drum up Nato support for our ongoing invasion of Afghanistan. This goes on as we begin to introduce M1 Abrams tanks into Afghanistan. Previously we held out tanks, worrying that they would remind Afghans of the tank heavy Soviet invasion. But a senior Pentagon official says "We've taken the gloves off, and it's had a huge effect.". Another official opined that all the property damage is having a positive effect, because it forces the family, whose home has just been destroyed, to petition the governor with a damage claims. This officia stated "In effect, you're connecting the [Afghan] government to the people".


No, I'm not making any of that up, although I wish I were. In other news, all the oppressive airport security is finally getting on people's nerves. Turns out they can deal with long lines, invasions of privacy, taking their shoes off and random laptop seizures, but they draw the line at being given the choice between having their genitals groped or having a 3D nudie photo of them taken.


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Our lunatic Military | 23 comments (18 topical, 5 editorial, 0 hidden)
mr moose this is terrible (3.00 / 7) (#1)
by jxg on Mon Nov 22, 2010 at 07:32:21 AM EST

please just write articles in your area of expertise

The thing about the 2010s is, (none / 1) (#4)
by ksandstr on Mon Nov 22, 2010 at 05:32:56 PM EST

by the day's standards, Space Moose seems rather quaint.

Fin.
[ Parent ]
I like how the t-shirt saying changes (none / 0) (#12)
by Calalily on Tue Nov 23, 2010 at 03:31:49 PM EST

in each frame and the girl's response too.

We are maggots tunneling through a rotting corpse. QuantumFoam
[ Parent ]
broken cancel button (3.00 / 6) (#2)
by nostalgiphile on Mon Nov 22, 2010 at 09:19:10 AM EST

let's FP this shit.

"Depending on your perspective you are an optimist or a pessimist[,] and a hopeless one too." --trhurler
'property damage is having a positive effect' (3.00 / 3) (#5)
by tdillo on Mon Nov 22, 2010 at 06:24:36 PM EST

Well she-it, I reckon we oughta drop a nuke on a couple Afgan cities and get 'em to surrender then. That worked out really swell for the Japanese.

And it's no secret why Americans are getting het-up by the pat-downs. We are a sexual repressed society and don't like being reminded that we even have genitals and things of that sort. You can have all the violence you want but if you even think about sex in a public area then Katy, Bar the door!

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.


re: the nukes on Japan (none / 0) (#20)
by el_guapo on Thu Dec 30, 2010 at 05:51:20 PM EST

It always gets my knickers in a wad when some ignorant fool criticizes the US atom bombs on Nagasaki and Hiroshima. We fire-bombed Cologne and Dresden to the ground as well. The truth - the informed truth - is that those 2 bombs likely saved thousands of Allied lives. It is notable that even after the second bomb, they didn't immediately surrender, but instead over-threw their emperor, who wanted to surrender.
mas cerveza, por favor mirrors, manifestos, etc.
[ Parent ]
it was still wrong (none / 0) (#21)
by livus on Wed Jan 05, 2011 at 05:26:07 AM EST

and you forgot the firebombing of Tokyo etc, another war crime of the US.

---
HIREZ substitute.
be concrete asshole, or shut up. - CTS
I guess I skipped school or something to drink on the internet? - lonelyhobo
I'd like to hope that any impression you got about us from internet forums was incorrect. - debillitatus
I consider myself trolled more or less just by visiting the site. HollyHopDrive

[ Parent ]
what??? (none / 0) (#22)
by el_guapo on Fri Apr 15, 2011 at 01:25:30 PM EST

the japs committed atrocities just as bad as the nazis! the rape of nanking, one POW camp general eating the livers of POWs. you are truly an idiot of history.
mas cerveza, por favor mirrors, manifestos, etc.
[ Parent ]
Not a war crime (none / 0) (#23)
by 7h3647h32in6 on Tue Apr 19, 2011 at 10:38:44 AM EST

For it to be a war crime, it would require the action to:

  1. Be illegal by some agreement
  2. That agreement to not have been violated beforehand by the other party.

Number 1 never happened, and number 2 was void by Pearl Harbor and the war crimes of Japan in China.

Dropping nukes wasn't wrong. It would be wrong now because our moral position on the issue has changed, but not then. I mean, they were just weapons, like any other, except more powerful.

[ Parent ]

what a fucking disappointment (3.00 / 2) (#6)
by lostincali on Mon Nov 22, 2010 at 07:11:50 PM EST

protip: next time you choose a username, don't give yourself such big shoes to fill.

"The least busy day [at McDonalds] is Monday, and then sales increase throughout the week, I guess as enthusiasm for life dwindles."

wait (3.00 / 2) (#9)
by Stick Apart on Tue Nov 23, 2010 at 10:10:00 AM EST

aren't we in Afghanistan because the Taliban was going to ban poppy production?

USA SUPPORTS FARMERS WORLDWIDE
also pope
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ASCII RIBBON for text-friendly internet

Welcome back (3.00 / 4) (#10)
by GhostOfTiber on Tue Nov 23, 2010 at 10:21:12 AM EST

I welcome everyone back with a -1. Don't take it personally.

Actually your story sucked. Take it personally.

[Nimey's] wife's ass is my cocksheath. - undermyne

TSA rules target the handicapped and kids as we (2.33 / 3) (#13)
by Calalily on Tue Nov 23, 2010 at 03:50:49 PM EST

all know little kids are terrors(ists) and the handicapped are carrying concealed weapons in their metal rod/plates, hip and colostomy bags, breast prosthetics, etc...

The head TSA guy said people "have a choice" as to whether or not to have the pat downs or go through the new scanners which is not entirely true as with the case of the handicapped mentioned above. They go through the new scanners, are flagged, and have to undergo the new invasive pats down anyway.

One woman had to show her breast prosthesis and another man had his urine bag dislodged by the aggressive pat down, even after he told them of his problem, resulting in urine being spilled all over him. They offered no help, no apology and he had to get on the plane urine soaked. HOWEVER, they are considering letting Muslim women in burkas a pass. WTF!


We are maggots tunneling through a rotting corpse. QuantumFoam

Agreed. Mules or llama's would be better (3.00 / 2) (#14)
by Blarney on Tue Nov 23, 2010 at 05:16:30 PM EST

At least, tanks aren't the best fit to the terrain or the infrastructure. There are Afghans who drive cars, motor fuel for them is available - but of course they won't just put any diesel in that billion dollar tanks, has to be official JP-8. Trucked in and delivered by contractors, this stuff costs $500/gallon by the time they're done, and results in plenty of deaths of contractors along the way - being in a convoy these days is worse than infantry.

Meanwhile the Taibs are going around with 'technicals' and horses. A better fit for the terrain.

In udder words: (3.00 / 5) (#16)
by Peahippo on Tue Nov 23, 2010 at 09:49:07 PM EST

This is how empires lose wars to goat herders.

[ Parent ]
How about this? (none / 0) (#17)
by claes on Thu Nov 25, 2010 at 10:13:04 AM EST

Big Dog Quadruped Robot

[ Parent ]
I've seen it demoed actually $ (none / 1) (#19)
by Blarney on Fri Nov 26, 2010 at 05:49:18 PM EST



[ Parent ]
WHAT IS THIS NIGGER SHIT (1.50 / 2) (#18)
by schlouse on Fri Nov 26, 2010 at 05:30:33 AM EST



Our lunatic Military | 23 comments (18 topical, 5 editorial, 0 hidden)
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